


Time of Dying

by Shadowkira



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombies, F/F, Friendship, Gore, Horror, Romance, Zombie Apocalypse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-17
Updated: 2014-03-17
Packaged: 2017-12-12 02:42:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/806233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowkira/pseuds/Shadowkira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A late night call to a case leaves the detectives reeling. What they originally thought to be a straight forward case escalates into something beyond them or their precinct. The women of SVU have time to bond and learn more about each others pasts as they fight for their survival. M for gore, language and violence. Eventual Rolivia, no smut but some sexual situations are possible.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

Olivia squinted as she approached the scene. The lights from the squad cars and the even brighter flood lights illuminating the entrance of the building intensifying the headache she had upon waking up.

Her eyes widened a bit as she turned to face the second undercover car to pull up after their own, "What are you two doing here?" She asked, Amaro pausing at her side.

Fin shrugged, "Guess it's a bad one." He responded simply before he and Amanda followed in behind them.

One of the uniformed officers turned to brief them, his face was pale. "We've detained the woman who owned the apartment, she is already on her way to the hospital. She was suffering from an extremely high fever and possibly a head wound from what the paramedics told us."

"Who was her assailant?" Amanda asked, the man shook his head.

"No ma'am, you misunderstand... _She_ was the assailant." He replied, extending his hand to lead them inside.

Fin and Olivia exchanged looks before following the man and their two partners inside the building. The officer leading the detectives paused a moment just outside of the apartment.

"It is pretty bad in there... I'll let the M.E. handle the rest of the scene." He said, his expression speaking volumes as he refused to go back into the apartment.

Olivia frowned at the response, she knew some of the uniformed officers had weak stomachs but she was pretty sure she had seen this man handling some pretty unfortunate and disturbing cases before.

"What've we got, Melinda?" Fin asked as he moved first into the apartment and the woman in question emerged from the first bedroom. Her expression grim.

"I am honestly not sure at this point, the woman in this room... From what we gathered, is the mother of the tenant."

Fin's brows furrowed as he looked into the room from just beyond the threshold. A rather large piece of couch was blocking the door. "She stabbed her own mother..? Deserves a daughter of the year award." He said sarcastically as he shook his head before falling back to allow the others a look.

"What's even more bizarre is she seems to have been dead several days... And the room as you can see was blocked off."

"From the outside? Sounds like the daughter was afraid of her mother... But why?" Amanda said, her eyes glancing between the senior detectives. "The woman doesn't really look like she would have been a physical threat."

Melinda nodded, "That's what I thought too, and there are no other weapons aside from the knife. If you come into the room... The back of the door is nearly worn through and the mother's nails are pretty much obliterated."

"So she was locked in here for a while..." Amaro said, his eyes studying the deep scratches to the door.

"She also appears to have been sick," Melinda continued, "We found Antiviral meds that had been purchased within the last two weeks, I'm going to check the mother for pneumonia during the autopsy."

Fin nodded, "We were warned that this was pretty bad Warner, this seems mild at best, if not a little loony. Where's the real deal?" He asked, his voice holding a knowing tone.

"Follow me but be aware, this is gruesome." Melinda responded calmly. The detectives followed her to the middle of the apartment and into the kitchen. The tiled floor was littered with broken dishes and blood. Amanda frowned slightly as she took in the initial sight of it.

"Good God... Looks like a war zone."

Amaro shot her a look, his eyes moving back to Melinda as she paused in front of the sink.

Olivia had barely made it passed the counter when she turned away, her hand over her mouth.

Amanda looked toward the senior detective, a bit shocked by her response. The brunette pushed passed the rest of them, her color quickly leaving her cheeks. Fin stood still, his eyes staring unblinkingly at the floor before he turned with a shake of his head.

"What-" Amanda started but her voice caught in her throat as she rounded the counter. Tattered remains of flesh and bone clung to a small bloody form on the tile.

"I wouldn't recommend lingering." Melinda said softly, pulling the blonde back into the small dinning room. "This is where we found the mother, she broke the dishes and tried to attack the officers when they entered the apartment. They brought in SWAT before you all got here because of how violent she was. I was waiting outside, I had been up working on another case when I got the call so I got here pretty fast... She was babbling like she'd been struck in the head but that could have just been the fever talking."

"She _ate_ her baby?" Olivia asked, her voice incredulous. A heavy weight had begun to press in on her abdomen; a wave of nausea rushing up her throat. In all of her years working on the Special Victims Unit, she had never seen anything like it.

"Unfortunately that's what it looks like, like I said... She could be extremely delirious from her fever. She was loud, violent and apparently was biting and scratching at the SWAT team as they subdued her. She was obviously not in the state of mind to be around a child. It's very unfortunate."

Amaro shook his head, "I need to get out of here, if that's alright..." He groaned, trying his best to think of the beautiful face of his own little girl and forget the scene that lay just feet away.

"I think it's best that you guys begin the investigation anyway. A second child was rescued safely from the apartment. He's at the hospital being checked out and he's old enough to talk." Warner offered, casting a sympathetic gaze toward Olivia specifically who was leaning heavily against the table.

The brunette nodded, straightening up. As she did so the feeling of nausea quickly passed and was replaced with anger. "Yeah, I'll go talk to him. As soon as the mother is up, she'd better have a damn good explanation as to what happened in this apartment."

Olivia looked toward Amaro, the man was busily typing on his phone, "Hey, why don't you head home? I'm sure someone else can go with me. Go see your daughter."

He shot her a weak smile and nodded before heading out, phone pressed to his ear.

Olivia glanced back toward Fin and Amanda, the man met her gaze with a serious expression. "I'm going to stay here with Melinda and see if we can't find anything else, you two chew that bitch out for me once she's up, will ya?" He said, giving the blonde a pat on the shoulders.

Amanda nodded, relief washing over her at the chance to leave the apartment.

 

**xxx**

The car ride to the hospital had passed in silence, the two women both lost in their own thoughts.

They quickly made their way from the front desk to the room the young boy had been placed in, when they entered the room they found him scribbling on a piece of paper with some crayons. The nurse smiled, dipping her head before giving the detectives some time alone with the child.

Olivia smiled at him as she pulled a chair closer to the hospital bed, his eyes moved over toward her shyly but his head did not rise.

"Hi there, Hector, what are you drawing?" The brunette asked gently, the boy glanced back down before handing her the piece of paper he had been working on.

"Is that your Momma?" Amanda asked, her own smile widening a little. The boy nodded in response, his shy demeanor still sticking with him.

"Hector... I know you've had a long night but my partner Amanda and I, we need to ask you some questions... Okay?" Olivia asked, giving the boy back his drawing.

"About Mommy?" He asked finally, his voice small.

Olivia nodded, "Yes, about your Mommy. And your Grandma too, if that's okay."

The boy remained silent for a moment, Olivia knew he was around six years old. And although he probably hadn't understood everything that had happened in the apartment he had enough of an idea that he could give them a glimpse as to what had occurred.

"Grandma was sick... She stayed in bed all Saturday... Mommy got worried and went to see her, I heard a lot of yelling... I stayed with Sophie until Mommy came back."

"Were you waiting for her for a while?" Olivia asked, her voice still gentle.

"Yes and when I went to go potty, Mommy told me I couldn't open the door for Grandma. She wouldn't tell me why."

Olivia looked over towards Amanda before looking back to Hector, "And this was on Sunday?"

"Yes, Mommy stayed out in the living room and told me to stay in the bedroom with Sophie and watch cartoons... I heard more yelling and when Mommy came back she was hurt."

"Hurt how, Hector?" Amanda asked, the boy lowered his eyes to his hands. He picked at his nails for a moment before looking back up at the blonde.

"She had a mark, on her arm." He pointed to a spot on his forearm up by his elbow, "It looked like a bite."

Olivia sat back, a thoughtful expression crossing her features.

"What happened then, Hector?"

"Mommy pushed the couch in front of Grandma's room... We stayed in the bedroom after that, me, Mommy and Sophie. I was supposed to go to school on Monday... But Mommy told me I could stay home with her, I wanted to go... Grandma kept yelling and making loud noises in her room."

"When we woke up, Grandma wasn't yelling anymore... And Mommy was sick."

"Sick like your Grandma?" Olivia asked, the boy shook his head.

"No, Mommy was coughing up red stuff..." Hector said, his eyes lowered to his drawing as he once again picked up a crayon to work on his picture.

The boy remained quiet then, as if he had nothing more to say. Olivia glanced up toward Amanda before looking back to Hector, "Anything else before we go and check on your Mommy?" Olivia asked, flashing a wide smile toward the child.

Hector's eyes moved up finally but he didn't speak, Olivia chewed on the inside of her cheek for a moment before trying again.

"When did Mommy get angry?"

The boy got a thoughtful look on his face, "Wednesday... I stayed in the bedroom, she told me to. I wanted to get Sophie but I promised Mommy..."

Olivia placed her hand over the boy's much smaller one, "You did a good job Hector, you're safe. That's what matters." She said, her smile softening. Her hand pulled back as she moved to rise from her chair, returning it to it's spot against the wall.

"We're going to go and see if we can talk to your Mommy now, okay? You get some rest, we'll stop in to see you again if we can."

The boy nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips as he waved goodbye to them.

The two detectives made their way down the hall in silence at first, Amanda breaking the silence. "So... What do you think?" She asked, her eyes moving over towards the older woman.

"I think... That left us with even more questions, don't you?"

The blonde nodded, "Yes, definitely. I wonder why the daughter was coughing up blood? If she'd caught any illness from the mother, you'd think she would have had the same symptoms..."

Olivia nodded,"Yeah, I agree. We'll have to see what the doctors have to say."

Within minutes the two detectives found themselves being lead toward the woman's room, the nurse leading them stopped in front of a door with blocked out windows. "I'll pop in and see if they've made any progress but I can't promise you anything. Last time I saw her she was yelling jibberish and fighting the restraints, it sounds like they at least have her sedated now... But you won't be able to talk to her until she's lucid."

Olivia smiled, "Any form of update would be very helpful, thank you."

"Too bad we won't get an interview..." Amanda mumbled, checking her phone. "I would have loved to talk to this _fine lady."_ The blonde said, her southern drawl holding a bit of a deeper tone as she narrowed her eyes toward the windows.

The two waited in silence a few moments before the nurse finally exited the room, a disappointed look written across her features.

"We're not really sure what's going on with her, I can tell you that they've been fighting her fever since she was brought in. But nothing we do to lower it seems to be working, she's probably not going to make it. I'm sorry ladies."

Olivia frowned at the news, that would stop the case as it was. And Hector would not only be without a family but without closure as well. Thanking the nurse, the two detectives locked the knowledge they had gathered away and headed back to the precinct.

 

**xxx**

Munch smiled as Olivia and Amanda entered the squad room, "How did it go?" He asked, Amaro and Fin looked up from their work.

"As well as it could, I suppose." Olivia responded with a sigh, "We talked to the son but his responses really only left more to figure out."

Amanda nodded, "Yeah and his Momma was out cold, still on fire 'cuz of that damn fever."

"Shit..." Fin mumbled, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "I was hopin' you two would do better than Melinda and me."

"No luck?" Amanda asked, leaning against Munch's desk.

"Nada, she's looking at the Grandma's body now... Hopefully the autopsy will turn up somethin' good."

Cragen nodded as he caught the end of the conversation, "Yes, I do too. Now that I'm here I want you all to get some rest. You can continue this in the afternoon once we have more information on the case."

The group gave a collective sigh but no argument, they knew Cragen was right. There was no point in wasting their energy now when they had nothing to go on, it was better to get rest while they had the time to kill.

 

**xxx**

The afternoon passed quietly, the detectives were working on their paperwork for other cases when Fin's phone let out a loud beep.

"C'mon guys, we're headin' to the morgue. Melinda's got something."

 

**xxx**

Melinda smiled slightly as the detectives filed in, she took off her gloves and picked up her clip board.

"Sorry about the wait, guys. Had to triple check some things, you ready?"

They all nodded, eyes intently glued on the M.E.

"I checked her lungs and I did find signs of Pneumonia."

"Meaning?" Fin asked, his voice colored with impatience.

"She died from the illness, not the stabbing."

Melinda's smile had long since disappeared, her eyes shifted from person to person as she watched the words sink in for the detectives.

Amaro was the first to speak up, "Hold on... I don't think I heard you right..."

"Oh, no. You did detective. The damage to the victim's nails was also sustained post mortem."

"Melinda..." Olivia started, her brows furrowed in confusion.

"I know how this sounds guys..." The M.E. said, moving over to the examining table. "But that is what the wounds are telling me."

Amaro scratched the back of his neck, "Are you absolutely positive? I mean, how can you tell?"

Melinda arched a brow at him, "Yes, I am positive. The wounds have minimal blood loss considering the injury, i.e. a stabbing to the eye. While we see some blood loss... There would be far more if the heart had been beating at the time of the attack."

Olivia's lips drew into a tight line, "How long was she dead before the injuries were inflicted?"

Melinda shook her head, "It's hard to say, decomposition was most likely a little elevated given the heater in her room... I'll give you what I have in my full, written report and you can mesh it with what you learned from the boy... How was he, by the way?"

Amanda's eyes brightened at the change of subject, "He was doin' really well, wasn't a mark on him. Our conversation with him went about as well as your autopsy though... Left lots of questions."

Melinda nodded, "I wish I could be of more help guys... But I did my job to the best of my ability with this case, the body doesn't lie."

The detectives nodded their thanks and Olivia cast one last glance toward what she could see of the body laid out on the table.

More questions, just what they needed.


	2. Losing Face

Olivia and Amanda moved quickly through the hallways of the hospital, Melinda had sent them in to talk to the nurse that had dealt with Mrs. Mendez when she was given her antiviral pills.

"Excuse me, are you Sarah?" Olivia asked, flashing her badge and a smile towards the shorter woman.

"Yes, I am. How can I help you, detectives?"

"We need to talk to you about a patient you saw recently, Esma Mendez."

The woman's eyes widened slightly, "Esma? Oh no... She's not hurt, is she?"

Amanda nodded with a frown, "I'm sorry to tell you this ma'am but Mrs. Mendez passed away. She was found very early Friday morning, we came to talk to you about the illness that she had been suffering from."

Olivia pulled the plastic bag containing the pill bottle of antiviral medicine that had been found on scene.

"I don't... We were treating her ahead of time, she was very ill and we were concerned she was contracting pneumonia. But she refused to stay here at the hospital, she was always a very strong willed woman."

"What about her daughter?"

"Also strong willed, they were both good people. What happened? I hadn't heard anything from them..."

"We're still investigating, it seems there was some sort of altercation between Mrs. Mendez and her daughter... Have you heard anything on Carla by any chance?"

The nurse shook her head, "No, last I heard she was still sedated and very weak. That was just an hour or two ago."

"I see. If you hear anything, or if anything changes can you make sure someone contacts me?" Olivia asked, handing the shorter woman one of her business cards. "Thank you."

The nurse nodded, "Will do."

**xxx**

"Any luck ladies?" Fin asked as Olivia and Amanda entered the squad room, the two shook their heads.

"Still nothing, we confirmed with the nurse that the Grandmother had been sick... And also that the mother and daughter had gotten along really well. Doesn't add up with what went down in that apartment."

Amaro snorted, "Nothing that went down in that apartment adds up."

The squad room was silent for a few hours aside from the clicking of keys as the detectives filled in what information they could given the situation. Once they'd finished they moved on to any other cases or paper work they had laying around.

Olivia was just leaning back in her chair to stretch when her phone began to ring, her brows lifted in response. She cast a quick glance towards the eager faces of her colleagues before answering.

"Olivia Benson. Ah, yes. Hello Sarah..." Olivia's smile quickly disappeared as she listened intently to the woman on the other line, Amanda frowned as she noted the expression on the older woman's face fall further.

The detectives saw Cragen emerge from his office, everyone waited in silence as Olivia jotted a few things down on a tablet.

"Alright, thank you. I appreciate you contacting me so quickly. Try to have a good rest of your shift, I will. Bye."

"Bad news, I take it." Cragen asked, leaning more heavily against his door frame. The brunette nodded, shaking her head with a sigh.

"Carla Mendez didn't make it, apparently they couldn't get her fever down... Her body just gave out."

Cragen nodded, "I know this is frustrating... But without the suspect we have no case, there have been similar crimes popping up in the city... And the country. I was actually getting ready to come out here to break the news to all of you when Olivia got the call. This case would have been out of our hands regardless. The government is stepping in, we're going to be getting some CDC representatives and some military back up. All cities and or states with growing cases of this kind are getting the same treatment. We are to assist their investigation in any way we can, this includes making arrests. But they call the shots once they get here, understood?"

Olivia's eyes narrowed, "I'm not sure I understand, what's the CDC got anything to do with our case?"

"It was originally believed that drugs could have been a factor in some of the other cases... I'm going to make sure I get a full toxicology report on Miss Mendez's body and the only drugs found in her mother's body were antivirals. The extent of the other cases drug use from what we have seen has been Marijuana."

"So... If it's not drugs, they're thinking that there's some kind of disease making this happen?" Munch asked, his voice incredulous. "Sounds to me like another excuse... Probably something our own government concocted to win wars, testing it out for population control."

Cragen narrowed his eyes at the detective and Munch cleared his throat. "Just a theory."

"In any case, this is finished. Make sure to organize the information you gathered and submit it to me, I want to make sure all of our ducks are in row before these folks get here."

**xxx**

Following the news from the Captain the detectives had decided to go out for a few drinks, the chit chat involved anything but their cases.

Amanda sat at the end of the group, swirling the amber colored liquid around the bottle in her hand. She chewed on her lip as she listened to the rest of her coworkers converse.

She had nothing to add, she did nothing out side of the job. Except for to go to her meetings... But she didn't even know how many of them knew about her 'problem' and quite frankly she didn't want to talk about it.

"Alright, I gotta get home." Amaro said, the statement bringing Amanda back to the bar with a blink.

She turned towards them, a frown tugging at her lips. The others nodded in agreement, checking their watches and realizing the time.

She glanced back toward her beer, chugging it before setting it back on the bar. She could feel the weight of her loneliness already and the others were still just in the stage of gathering their coats and finishing the last of their drinks.

She didn't want to say goodbye, not this soon. All she had waiting for her was an empty apartment, a racing mind and a fear of what she might do with her free time.

She kept quiet, brushing past them while they all smiled and laughed. Cracking a joke or two as they bid their farewells.

Olivia saw a flash of blonde, her brows furrowed as she realized the younger detective had already abandoned her stool and was headed to the door.

Realizing no one else saw Rollins, the brunette quickly bid her farewells and started after her.

She could see the blonde, just exiting the dimly lit building. "Amanda!"

She called after her but it didn't seem to register to the blonde, instead her attention seemed drawn to something up the street. Olivia watched as she paused, hand holding the door open just barely passed her body. Her eyes narrowing for a moment before she broke into a full on sprint.

Feeling a strange pull of dread at her stomach the senior detective moved to follow, the cool air hit her face as she exited the building. And that's when she heard it, the screaming.

She could see Amanda, gun in hand. The younger woman was yelling something to a figure hunched over what appeared to be a body. A young woman just off to the side of the scene was crying, she was backed into the entrance of an alley almost hidden from view.

The victim's cries were almost too loud to hear the woman's pleas for help, it was an awful sound. Olivia unhooked the clasp to her holster as she moved forward but she couldn't seem to run fast enough.

Before she knew it, she heard the bang of Amanda's gun. There was a flash as the bullet moved toward its intended target and then a low curse from the blonde when the attacker didn't respond.

Olivia felt her stomach sink further when she saw Amanda throw herself forcefully onto the hunched form, a loud screech like cry broke out and echoed through the streets.

**xxx**

Amanda grunted as she grabbed a hold of the man, he felt cold to the touch. She dismissed this fact as she struggled to hold him still, she chalked it up to the fact that he was without a shirt in such cold weather.

"You're under arrest. Release that man, right now." She bit out, her muscles straining as the man tried to force her arms away.

Her only response were low growls and grunts, the man's grip was extremely tight as he tried to pry her forearms apart from each other and successfully free himself from her grip. But she held fast, stumbling back a bit as he leaned heavily into her smaller frame. She glanced down slightly, her gun glinting as it caught the glow from the nearest street light.

Glancing up toward the woman sobbing just feet away, the detective made a quick decision. "I don't know how long I can hold him... Get your man outta here, now." She said firmly.

The woman nodded, trying to move her boyfriend as gently as she could away from the scuffle.

Amanda could hear someone approaching from behind them, she grit her teeth as the man pushed into her again.

"Amanda, I need you to get away from him so I can get a clear shot!" Olivia cried, her gun at the ready.

The blonde shook her head, "Not until it's safe to let him go-" Her words were cut off as she stumbled again and was unable to regain her balance, the man had used his weight to his advantage.

As she fell she tightened her grip on him, her body suffering because of her decision.

Unable to catch herself, her head slammed into the concrete with a sickening crack causing white splotches to fill her vision. Sound dissipated for a few seconds, and all she felt was the weight on top of her.

"Amanda!" Olivia warned, fear tightening her chest as she watched the blonde's prone form slowly release the man on top of her.

The brunette swore under her breath, slowly closing the gap between herself and the two forms just feet away. She didn't want to spook the man and make him draw a weapon or further injure Amanda.

**xxx**

Amanda groaned, there was a red hot pain settled across the back of her skull. Sound was slowly returning to her but it seemed to be tied to the pulse of her heart. It was almost as if her ears were popping in and out. She could hear the muffled sound of talking, the voices sounded familiar.

A wave of nausea washed over her as she felt the weight on her abdomen increase and shift, strangely cool breath moved across her face.

Her eyes fluttered open and she instantly wished they would close again. The face hovering above her own was half veiled in darkness and what she could see of it was unpleasant. The eyes and cheeks were sunken in. Blood covered the pale flesh of the face, bits of muscle and flesh hung from the man's teeth and lips.

Balling up her fingers in the edge of her sleeves, the woman did her best to keep her own skin as far away from the man as possible. He was still in the process of rolling over but she could hear his teeth clacking as he tried to find a spot where he could bite into her.

Fear took hold as he managed to get himself fully on top of her. She could hear men screaming down the street by now. Her hearing almost fully returned and she guessed the others had finally emerged from the bar.

Trying to calm her body's urgent instincts to panic, the woman covered herself as best she could, praying her thick leather jacket would offer her more than just protection from the cold.

It was then that the shot rang out. Amanda welcomed the painful ringing in her head as she felt the body above her go limp. The weight fell off to her right side as the body collapsed onto the sidewalk.

Within seconds, Olivia was there kneeling next to the smaller woman after she kicked the rest of the lifeless form off of the blonde.

Amanda's eyes fluttered open weakly, a smile tugged at her lips as she tried to keep up her bravado. "Nice shot. I guess I looked good enough to eat... Too bad I don't feel like it."

Olivia couldn't help but chuckle, relief washing over her when she heard the bad joke. Looking past her shoulder and back toward the bar, the brunette cried out to the men who were quickly approaching.

"Fin-"

"I know, already called for two buses. They'll be here soon." He said, his expression clouded with worry.

Munch moved over to check on the victim and his girlfriend, his voice too soft to hear.

Amaro approached, sliding his gun in his holster before shaking his head. "Amanda, what were you thinking?" He asked, the blonde stiffened in Olivia's arms.

Olivia shot her partner a look, shaking her head and furrowing her brows.

But it was too late, Amanda sat up suddenly. Her adrenaline being reignited by her anger, she rose onto unstable feet before attempting to stalk off and away from the group.

"Amanda..." Olivia said softly, but the other woman ignored her.

Olivia couldn't help but stare at Amanda's hand and part of her pant leg. They were both coated with a thick layer of crimson. She looked up just in time to see the stubborn blonde's knees give out, her body following shortly after. Shooting Amaro a disapproving look Olivia and Fin both made their way over to their downed friend.

**xxx**

Within fifteen minutes of Amanda collapsing, the street was buzzing with lights, vehicles and reporters. Shielding the downed detective as best they could from the cameras, Olivia watched as the paramedics loaded Amanda into one of the ambulances.

As one of the men who had checked the blonde out approached, Olivia fell back and let the guys handle the reporters. "How is she?"

"She'll be fine. We're taking her in and will be keeping her over night to observe her and run some tests. She seems to have a concussion and we want to double check that is the only injury she sustained."

Olivia nodded, "Alright, thank you." She said, allowing the man to get back to the ambulance so that they could get the injured to the hospital.

As she was walking back toward her partner and the other detectives she over heard a comment that made her blood boil.

"So you're saying the police have no idea what's going on? People are just getting sick and eating each other? It's a drug problem?" The reporter responded sarcastically, Olivia arched a brow. Glaring at the man as he noticed her return from talking to the paramedic.

Amaro shook his head, "I don't know where you're getting your information, but we never said it had anything to do with a drug problem." He argued, the man laughed.

"It's been reported that the incidents down in Florida may be linked to the distribution of a new street drug known as 'bath salts,' I'm surprised you wouldn't know that... _Detective_."

"That's Florida and the last time I checked... This is New York. The cases might be similar but so far we haven't found a definite link between all of the separate instances that have taken place with in the last month, _sir_." Fin shot back, Amaro smiled glad to have the back up.

The reporter glanced toward Fin before moving on to Olivia, who he had hoped to catch off guard. "And what news do you have dealing with the people who were attacked here tonight?"

"The man is in critical condition, beyond that I do not know. And the detective who put her life on the line to keep him from a body bag has a concussion and possibly worse." She responded, her voice dripping with venom.

The man narrowed his eyes, covering up his embarrassment before turning back to the camera. "And there you have it folks, more questions arise as these vicious attacks continue..."

"Idiot." Olivia grumbled, rubbing her neck as she and the guys finally made their escape.

"They're really comin' down on us hard, what the hell do they think we can do if this really is some kind of outbreak? We're just cops." Fin spat, his emotions getting the best of him.

Munch shook his head, "It's not about that. It's just about having someone to place blame on, they're scared. They need something."

Fin nodded, looking to Olivia who seemed distant. "So she had a concussion?"

"Yeah, they're taking her in and keeping her over night to run some more tests... But they said she should be okay, didn't need the reporters knowing the full story. They'll end up twisting it regardless."

Olivia looked up at the partially concealed moon. Ever since these attacks had started, everyone was left only with questions, even when they had been presented with a case they didn't really figure out anything concrete. Now they not only lost their case but were faced with new issues... Like facing the people who were scared. They wanted answers to the same questions the detectives had and until the answers were found, the fear would only build further.

"Hey." Fin said, his voice soft as he placed a hand on Olivia's shoulder.

"Go home and get some rest, I'm going to also. We can meet up tomorrow at the precinct and give Amanda a call. I have a feeling she won't be in tomorrow."

"Yeah... Alright, I'm beat. See ya tomorrow, Fin."

* * *


	3. Welcome Back

Olivia chewed at her lip thoughtfully as she sat at her desk. Worry had begun to set in, Amanda had still not shown up for work.

Fin shot her a look as the door knob to Cragen's office turned. The man nodded to his detectives as he approached them. "I'm sure you're all wondering how Amanda is doing. She just called, she said that the doctors finally gave her the okay to head home. She's not feeling up to coming in so I told her to take at least today off. But she swears she's fine and told us not to worry."

"Glad to hear she's alright, thanks Cap'n."

Cragen nodded, "Our new friends are going to be here in two days, make sure you have your written reports together and submitted to me by the end of today guys."

The detectives let out a collective sigh and nodded, their tired eyes moving back to their work.

**xxx**

Amanda felt relief wash over her as her key slid into the lock, she was glad to be home. The tests the doctors had run hadn't been too horrible but they'd kept her up all night. She was definitely ready to lay down and get some rest.

During her scuffle with the perp, she'd sustained a small laceration to the back of her head. The doctors had given it a thorough cleaning and then stitched it up. Due to it's location she couldn't see the wound but she'd been told it had taken four stitches to close it.

Her fingers paused just over the wound, the temptation to touch it almost getting the better of the her. Shaking her head she locked her door before moving into her small kitchen. She filled up her tea kettle before placing it on the stove and turning on the burner.

The blonde made her way back into her bedroom, changing quickly into a tank top and a fresh pair of underwear. Moving into the bathroom, Amanda inspected her reflection.

She paused a moment, frowning slightly as she looked at her tired features. Her eyes were dull and dark circles had gathered beneath them.

She had hoped that the transfer to New York would make her life easier. The listless face in the mirror cracked a smile, nothing had ever been easy for Amanda Rollins. Why should that change now?

The blonde blinked as the whistling of her kettle brought her back to reality, she quickly made her way into her kitchen. Pouring the water into her favorite mug before adding the peppermint tea bag.

"Shit..." She muttered upon realizing her TV was still unplugged. To keep herself from temptation, the young woman unplugged her TV whenever any of her favored sport teams had a game.

Grumbling, she tucked herself into a large, thick blanket on her couch. She sipped occasionally at her tea and let her mind go blank. After several minutes her eyelids began to droop as the steam from the hot tea moved passed her nose.

**xxx**

Cragen smiled at Olivia as she handed him the paper work for the Mendez case, he knew it was difficult for the woman to let any case go.

"Did you hear anything more on the son?" He asked, his voice gentle.

The brunette nodded, "Yes, his Aunt is coming up from Florida to get him. From what I heard she's going to adopt him into her family down there."

"Good, I'm glad to hear something went right." He said, offering her a smile before she exited his office.

As soon as she was out of Cragen's office Olivia's mind went back to Amanda, she knew the young detective had a lot to return to. Retrieving her iPhone from her back pocket the brunette typed out a message as she walked towards her desk. Once she'd finished she glanced up and could see the other detectives gathering their things to head home. Amaro seemed to be the only one not up and moving.

He instead was casually playing with the tab on the can of his energy drink. Olivia could tell by her partner's expression that he was lost in thought.

"Hey Nick, you okay?" She asked as she grabbed her jacket from the back of her chair.

"Uh, yeah. Fine. Did any of you see the news earlier?"

The detectives all shook their heads, everyone but Amaro had worked through their lunch breaks in order to get done earlier.

"Ah, well... I guess you wouldn't have." The man said, chuckling nervously. "Well, when I went home to see Zara... I stopped to get coffee on the way back in."

The senior detectives nodded, they knew he'd stopped because he'd brought in drinks for everyone but himself.

"They had an update on our vic," He paused a moment, trying to find the right words to describe the man's condition. "He's still in critical, they say they're going to have to do extensive surgery to his face if he makes it. He's missing an eye and about sixty percent of his facial tissue."

Olivia shook her head, disgust written across her features. Fin and Munch had similar looks on their faces as they digested the information.

"I don't even know what to say..." Munch said, pulling his glasses off to clean them.

"That's a first." Fin retorted, trying to lighten the mood.

The four of them laughed for a moment before bidding their farewells, leaving Amaro behind to finish his paper work in silence.

**xxx**

Amanda sat up, her body heavy and groggy. She attempted to look at her surroundings but found the task difficult because of how dark it was.

As time passed, her eyes grew more and more adjusted to the darkness. The only light source was the moon, high above and partially covered by clouds.

Feeling more confident now that she had her vision back, the blonde stood up slowly. She was extremely confused as to where she was. The last thing she remembered was curling up on her couch.

But this was definitely not her couch, or her apartment. She had doubts that she was even in the city anymore. Taking a small step forward the woman began to make her way through the darkness. She could see what appeared to be abandoned vehicles littering the small stretch of road she was on.

There was no sign of any people though, so she continued on. Occasionally she'd pause when she would hear a sound but it usually was nothing.

After a few minutes, Amanda heard what she thought to be muffled talking. "Hello? Is anyone there?"

She asked, trying to hide the fear she felt from escaping into her voice. There was no response, the noise stopped for a moment before continuing.

Amanda moved forward toward the sound, the words didn't become any clearer as she closed the distance.

Peeking around the edge of a car the blonde found the source of the sound. Her breath caught as she pressed her body against the abandoned vehicle.

A hunched form was groaning and grumbling as it ripped flesh from a motionless body. Covering her mouth with one hand the detective peeked around the car again, taking in more of the scene this time.

There was a gun just off to the left of the two figures and she could plainly see now that the ill person was female. Long blonde hair was pulled back into what she guessed had once been a tight pony tail. It was now disheveled and sticking out at odd angles from the head.

Keeping her eye on the infected, the detective moved forward as quietly as she could. Once she had a grip on the gun, she rolled back onto her heels before standing. The sick woman paused as she heard the click of the gun being cocked. Amanda stood still, her jaw set as the figure turned.

The detective's eyes widened as they met the pale eyes of the infected, she stumbled back a bit. Almost losing her grip on the gun as recognition hit home.

"H-how?" She whispered weakly, her own voice almost making her jump.

She glanced passed the ghoulish figure, her eyes widening further as she realized she recognized the corpse too.

"No." Amanda whispered, shaking her head. It was a dream, and she knew it. There was no other explanation.

She glanced up one more time to look over the now grotesque features of Olivia Benson, the older woman's face and neck were torn to shreds.

Her eyes then moved back to the pale ones that were following her every move, the eyes that were exactly like her own.

Lifeless and listless. Actually, if anything the eyes watching her at least had one thing she did not. They held purpose, intent. She watched as the deformed image of herself approached without hesitation.

The mouth moving slowly, a faint groan accompanying each movement.

Amanda stumbled back more, her leg caught on something and she fell backwards.

"No..." She whispered, her eyes burning as she realized she'd fallen over a corpse. This one was partially eaten as well but her mind seemed to have blurred the facial features, keeping her from discovering the identity of the man. Whoever he was, he had probably suffered the same fate as Olivia... A death by her own hands.

The infected creature that so closely resembled her had now picked up speed, its arms outstretched. Amanda tried to close her eyes and will the scene away. An attempt that she hoped would bring her back into the waking world.

But nothing happened, she remained still, her eyes clamped shut.

And that's when the anger took over, her eyes flew open. Her arms rose as her finger worried the trigger. She stared forward, her clear blue eyes locking with the pale blurry ones that had evoked so much fear.

"No." She breathed as her finger pressed against the trigger, the sound of the gun going off filled her senses. She could feel a sharp pain through her forehead followed by nothing.

She tried to open her eyes but was met only with darkness.

She tried to catch her breath but found nothing to fill her lungs.

There was nothing but silence and darkness to console her, she remained like that for what felt like forever until finally she woke up.

She took in a huge breath, air filling her lungs as she let out a small choking sob. She glanced around her, she was back on her couch. Her empty mug was still on the coffee table and her blanket was now in a ball on the floor.

She glanced toward the kitchen, her eyes squinting as she tried to make out the numbers on the clock of her microwave.

"7:30... Fantastic." Amanda grumbled, blowing the hair out of her face as she moved to rise. She glanced around her now dark apartment before reaching for the nearby light.

The bulb clicked to life and the blonde moved through the now illuminated room and into her kitchen.

**xxx**

Amaro nodded to some of the uniforms as he exited the elevator, he had always liked being first to work. But since his transfer to Sex Crimes, he'd noticed that he liked the peace and quiet at the beginning of the shift even more.

His brows rose as he round the corner into the squad room, he was surprised to see Amanda already seated at her desk. A cup of coffee next to her and her computer more than warmed up.

"Hey, how are you?" He asked, a smile brightening his features.

The blonde paused in her typing before smiling over her computer, "I've been better but I'm glad to be back at work, honestly."

Amaro paused for a moment, his eyes shifting away before finally moving back to Amanda's. "About the other night... I'm sorry."

Amanda didn't respond right away, "It's okay. I know you meant well and was just being stubborn." She said softly, her eyes seeming to go distant as she remembered the emotions that had come over her at the sight of the attack.

Nodding, Amaro gave her one last smile before heading to his own desk.

Amanda turned back to her computer, her fingers once again gliding across the keyboard. She wanted to get this report done as soon as possible, she wanted the memory of that night gone from her mind. Reliving it to get it down on paper was not something she'd been looking forward to.

Lost in thought, the blonde did not hear the other detectives as they made their way into the squad room. Munch and Olivia glanced over towards the younger woman before heading to their desks. Fin however, paused for a moment.

"Hey, good to see you back." He said, placing his hand briefly on her shoulder. She smiled at him, giving a quick nod before returning to her typing.

**xxx**

Cragen looked up as a small knock sounded on his door, after a moment it creaked open to reveal Amanda.

"Ah, you've finished your report?"

The blonde nodded, handing him the papers before sliding her hands into her pockets.

"Good, thank you." He paused a moment, his eyes staring at the print before finally rising again to meet hers. "How are you? I know things haven't been easy since you transferred here."

She took in a deep breath, slowly releasing it before responding. "I'm... Good. Things are getting better. This... It was just a hiccup, seriously. I'm fine. I just hope the victim is alright." She said, removing her right hand from her pocket before rubbing at the back of her neck.

Cragen nodded, he knew she probably didn't want to talk about it anymore but that couldn't be helped.

"I know it get's old, having to repeat that over and over... But you do seem to be doing better, I'm glad." He said, offering her a smile.

She returned it and then moved to leave but Cragen's voice stopped her.

"Amanda, wait. Before you head out today, you need to speak with someone about what happened."

Amanda turned, her brows furrowing in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I mean... You've had a traumatic experience, the board wants to make sure you not only submit the report... But that you're also given a psych evaluation."

Amanda chewed on her lip but nodded, "Alright cap'n, when will this be happening?"

"Whenever you're ready. If you'd like to go take a break, maybe get some food or something feel free."

"No, now is fine." Amanda said, trying to hold back the displeasure from her voice.

Cragen nodded, he rose from his desk before leading her to a secluded room. She recognized it as one of the ones often used for interrogations when the main rooms were full. It was a little smaller than the others, with dimmer colors and a heavily barred window. 'Comfy.' She thought sarcastically as they walked in.

She was surprised to see that Olivia and a man she recognized to be George Huang, were already in the room.

Olivia's eyes widened as she turned before getting up quickly from her seat. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd be back this soon. Good luck."

She added with a wink as she exited the room, Cragen nodded toward Amanda. "I'll leave you two to it then."

Huang smiled as Amanda took the seat Olivia had just been occupying, "Good to see you again, I wish it were under better circumstances... But at least this time we'll be able to get to know one another a little better."

Amanda smiled back, although she knew it was a weak one at best. She didn't like psychiatrists, and despite his pleasant appearance she knew he as already analyzing her.

"Alright, let's get started then... Tell me about the other night, from your point of view?"

"I heard yelling as I exited the bar, when I looked up the street I noticed what appeared to be the source. I drew my gun as a precaution as I didn't know what was actually happening..."

"Why were you leaving ahead of the others, if you don't mind me asking?" George asked, his eyes waiting for Amanda's to meet his again.

"I heard them mention the time and I uh... Forgot that one of my shows was coming on, they reminded me of the time." She lied, she saw the man give a slight nod.

He could tell that she was trying to divert him from the question. He decided to let it go, at least for now.

"So you came out and then rushed onto the scene... What did you see?"

"I saw a man attacking another man, the victim's girlfriend was just feet away... She was sobbing, and begging for me to help. I ordered the attacker to release the victim and stand, with his hands on his head. The only response I got was a..." She paused for a moment, as if searching for the right word to describe the response. "It was somewhere between a grunt and a growl... He stopped what he was doing for a second but otherwise didn't budge."

"And what was he doing?"

Amanda shuttered, "He was... Eating the other man, tearing into him."

"And what did you do when he didn't respond to your command?"

Amanda was a little surprised she didn't get the typical 'and how did that make you feel?' that most psychiatrists so often overused. She guessed it was because the answer was obvious.

"I repeated it, several times. At this point I could hear Olivia but it was too late... I was already pulling the trigger. I shot him in the back, right about at the shoulder blade on his left side."

"So you weren't aiming to kill?"

"No. But it wasn't entirely a sympathy shot for the attacker, I was worried I would hit the victim if it was a through and through. I figured the bone in his shoulder would stop the bullet, harm him and hopefully distract him."

"I see. And then?"

"I could hear Olivia coming up behind me, she was running. But the attacker hadn't let up so I decided it was best I tried to force him off. I grabbed him from behind and wrestled him off. I told the girlfriend to get the victim away if possible and Olivia was trying to tell me to release him so she could shoot."

"And you held on?"

"Yes, the victim was not out of the way of danger. I was worried if I released him too soon, he might not only attack me but go back after the other man as well."

Huang remained silent for a second, still not reaching for his pen. The writing implement had remained clipped to the file he'd been sitting with when Amanda entered the room.

Realizing the man was not going to say anything, Rollins decided to continue. "That's when the guy got really crazy, I was struggling to hold on to him. I could still hear Olivia yelling but the victim wasn't far enough away yet. It got to the point... That with all of the thrashin' he was doing, I lost my balance. Cracked my head on the sidewalk and everything went a little fuzzy."

She breathed in, a flash of the memory filling her senses. "I remember feeling him shifting on top of me, his disgusting breath on my face... I smelled blood, saw bits of flesh hanging from his mouth. I couldn't move, it was like I was frozen in fear. Literally... And then I heard the gunshot."

"So Olivia shot him before he could harm you?"

"Yes but man was he tryin'... He was snapping his teeth at me, trying to scratch or bite at the sleeves of my jacket... It was one of my favorites, they made me hand it over as evidence."

"I see, I'm sorry for your loss." He added with a chuckle and a smile in an attempt to shift the mood. Amanda's lips tugged upwards almost hesitantly.

She watched as Huang finally removed his pen from the file before jotting something down quickly.

"Now that's out of the way and we can have a more pleasant conversation. How's your new life working out in the new precinct? I've recently relocated as well, I know it can be stressful and lonely at times."

Amanda remained silent for a second, her eyes staring at the table in front of her. "It's been... Okay."

"Only okay? Anything you'd like to get off your shoulders while you're in here? Your secrets are safe with me and not just because of legal reasons." He said, offering her another smile.

"I just feel like a complete outsider, you know? I mean, Nick is new too... But he's from the area, even though I worked Sex Crimes in Atlanta I feel like I'm the newbie that everyone is exasperated with."

George nodded, "I know the feeling, I had a bit of a rough start in Oklahoma city... Being gay is always a bit of a risk when meeting new people but I felt especially alone this time. I don't flaunt it but I don't hide it either."

Amanda again remained silent but gave the man a small nod, "I know what you mean..."

Huang narrowed his eyes slightly but didn't press the subject, "Have you met anyone while you've been here? Or do you mainly hang out with the other detectives?"

"Just them, really. And... I'm sure you know this anyway... The people at my therapy sessions, I see them frequently there and talk. But I don't hang out with them otherwise."

"For gambling, right?"

She nodded, "Yeah, I have it under control now. Unplug the TV when a big game is coming up, go to the gym and run when I have free time. Keeps my head more clear too."

"That's good, exercise can really work wonders if it's done right." He glanced towards his watch, "It's getting late, so I'll ask a few more questions and then I think we can wrap this up. Sound good?"

"Yeah, I didn't want to be rude but I'm getting a little hungry." The blonde said with a laugh, her stomach letting out a loud grumble as if in agreement.

"Who do you feel closest to here at the precinct?" He asked, his eyes on hers.

"Fin, definitely. I mean, we're paired up almost all the time... But it goes beyond that, I feel like he knows me better than all of them too. He's like the older brother I never had."

"Is there someone you wish you were closer to? Or maybe someone that you disagree with a lot?"

The blonde's eyes moved towards the window as she answered without hesitation, "Olivia... I feel like she's annoyed with me half of the time. I was really excited to meet her when I realized where I was set to transfer to... She's got a really impressive track record with her cases. But she kind of gave me the cold shoulder until recently."

George lowered his pen and shut the file, "Give her time. She's probably still dealing with Elliot leaving, in essence... You were more his replacement than Nick. And..." He paused chuckling a bit, "she may be a little on guard with a younger woman being around now."

"She's not that much older... And she still kicks ass."

"Yes, that's true. She may just not be used to having another woman around and even though she would probably never admit it... She probably is a little threatened by you. If you start to do better, it may put pressure on her to do the same so it doesn't look like her age is a factor."

Amanda sat back, her teeth worrying her lip as she digested the words carefully. Before she could respond a small knock sounded on the door. A few seconds later Olivia's head was peeking around the door.

"Hey, sorry to interrupt... Wanted to see if you'd want to go get a drink after work George, I was getting ready to head home to change. Just shoot me a text if you're up for it."

Olivia said with a broad smile, Huang glanced at his watch again before looking up at Amanda.

"I think we're done here, unless you have anything else you'd like to talk about?"

Amanda shook her head, "Nah, I'm good. I think I'm going to head home and get some food before passing out. I'm exhausted."

Olivia glanced toward the younger woman, a little disappointed by the admission from the blonde. She had intended on inviting them both, she realized however that Amanda was probably tired and stressed from having to relive her ordeal.

Amanda watched as the two walked just ahead of her, she was playing around idly on her phone to make it look like she was busy.

"-I remember where it is Liv, don't worry. I'll wait there for you, if you want me to order you something let me know now."

Amanda felt that empty feeling returning, she might be hungry... But she was definitely not tired and she knew sleep wouldn't come even if she wanted it to.


	4. Fresh Start

Olivia smiled widely as she and George toasted to their night on the town, the man chuckled as he watched her take a deep drink from her beer.  
  
"So I know we got a little time to catch up at the precinct... But how's the love life been Liv?"  
  
Her grin widened despite her dislike of the topic, she had expected he would jump on it the first chance he got. She played with the edge of the label on her bottle, her eyes remaining lowered as she responded. "It's been alright, had someone recently but it was short lived."  
  
"It wasn't your partner, was it? He is cute but it didn't take long to notice the wedding band."  
  
She shot him a look, one brow arched. "No, not Amaro."  
  
"Who then? Someone outside of the job?"  
  
"You could say that... Either way, you don't know him. What about you? Any new flames in Oklahoma?"  
  
She said, trying to switch the spot light away from her rather embarrassment love life or lack there of.  
  
George laughed, "A few but none worth mentioning... They're nothing to write home about."  
  
"So flings, oh. I didn't take you as that type!" She mocked, her cheeks tinged a slight rouge from the alcohol she'd consumed.  
  
He laughed with a shake of his head, he then looked up toward the many drinks lining the bar. His eyes grew distant and unfocused for a moment before he turned back to the brunette.  
  
"So what do you think of the newbie?" He asked, his eyes dancing mischievously.  
  
"Nick is straight as an arrow, no chance there." She said, patting his shoulder with a cheeky grin.  
  
The man furrowed his brows before taking another sip of his drink, "I figured as much... You're diverting the question Olivia."  
  
"He's fine, really. He's a good guy, in many ways... He reminds me of Elliot, a younger version of him. He's got a lot to learn and I'm hoping his skin gets thick fast enough for him to stick around." She said honestly, her eyes dampening a bit as sadness creeped into them.  
  
George was shocked she had mentioned her old partner, especially by name. Although it was evident she was still sad about the abrupt departure of her long time friend, it was a sign that she was beginning to move on.  
  
"What about Amanda?" He asked, his eyes moving forward again briefly before flicking back to her own.  
  
"She's good. She's a lot more intune with the job than Nick is. She still has some to learn... And I doubt she'll get a guy anytime soon based off of her disgust for the pigs we've been dealing with but other than that... She's adjusting quickly." After she finished, she took a deep drink from her beer.  
  
"I don't think that's her problem with men." George replied in a quiet voice, his eyes closely watched the reaction on the brunette's face.  
  
"What? You think she's gay?" Olivia scoffed, a small chuckle escaping her. "Just because a woman's dating life is slow and she isn't having luck with men doesn't make her a lesbian."  
  
She sounded almost offended by the idea, Huang had to mentally check himself. Remembering that it was a sensitive subject for Olivia with the combination of her dating history and her being accused on more than one occasion of being gay herself.  
  
"I just got the vibe from her when I was talking to her earlier, my gaydar is usually pretty spot on."  
  
"Gaydar? Is that really a thing?" The woman wrinkled her nose in amusement, the alcohol definitely had her in quite a mood.  
  
"Regardless of whether or not she's gay, she seems like she's running into a lot of friction here. I feel stressed just looking at the poor woman."  
  
"Aren't you breaking the rules by telling me this?" Olivia said, her tone much more serious before.  
  
George shook his head with a smile, "This has nothing to do with my evaluation Olivia, this is my viewing her outside of a small room. Absent a clip board."  
  
Olivia chewed on the inside of her cheek, "I've been meaning to try to hang out with her outside of work... But things have been kind of crazy lately, all of these bizarre new attacks... And Fin told me she's been in therapy, I never know when she's available. And I don't want to bring up that subject if she hasn't mentioned it..." Her thoughts drifted back to the day she and Amaro had walked into the emotional conversation between Amanda and Cragen.  
  
"Just try it, believe me. Even a little bit goes a long way, I can relate to how she and Amaro feel. A transfer after that long was painful, especially when it was that far away." He could see the wheels turning as Olivia considered what he was saying, he had planted the seed. It was her turn to do something with it. He hoped that with any luck a friendship between the two of them would not only help Olivia fill the void left by Elliot's departure... But also make the younger woman feel more at home in her new surroundings.  
  
He changed the subject, a smile covering his features as he told her more about his new life.  
  
xxx  
  
"You aren't driving home, are you?" George chuckled, a more serious expression clouding his inebriated features as he supported Olivia out of the bar.  
  
"Of course not! I wouldn't risk my 'Stang." She pulled her wallet out of her coat pocket, double checking her cash before looking to her friend. "If you want a ride, I can take you to your hotel."  
  
She offered, toning her own voice down a bit as she stood on the street with him. He shook his head with a smile.  
  
"No thanks, I missed the city. I'm only about two blocks away so I'll walk and enjoy the view since this is the last night I'll be here for a while."  
  
Olivia smiled as a Taxi pulled up to the curb, she pulled George into a tight embrace, "Don't stay away for too long, I missed you." She said, her voice trailing off as she squeezed him tightly.  
  
"I missed you too Olivia, get home and get some rest. I'll give you a call tomorrow before I head out, if I don't have time to stop by the precinct."  
  
She smiled as she ducked into the Taxi, "I'll hold you to that."  
  
He waved as he watched the car pull away from the curb, his smile lingering as a chuckle escaped him. Some things never changed.  
  
xxx  
  
Amanda sat up, her body heavy and groggy. She squinted at the darkness that surrounded her, she was dreaming again.  
  
So far everything seemed to be the same as before, the only light source was still the moon. She was back on the abandoned highway and although she didn't want to go towards the scene she knew would play out... But she knew she had no other choice.  
  
After a few minutes of walking, Amanda heard the muffled sounds that reminded her she was drawing close to her destination. Instead of talking like she had the first time, the blonde remained quiet.  
  
Amanda moved forward toward the sound, crouching silently behind the same car she had during the first dream.  
  
Although at first glance everything seemed the same, the woman quickly realized there was a slight difference this time around.  
  
There was no gun, instead there was a long stick laying next to the infected woman who was tearing at the corpse.  
  
The infected still appeared the same and Amanda guessed it would still resemble herself when it turned around. Not wanting to linger in the dream longer than necessary, she moved forward and wrapped her fingers around the branch.  
  
She rolled back onto her heels before standing, her knuckles going white as she held the branch firmly in her hand. "Get off of her." She spat out coldly, the sick woman paused as she heard the words and her head twisted around eerily as she looked for the source.  
  
Amanda glanced passed the familiar features to make sure that the next part of the dream was still the same and quickly found that it was. She could feel bile rising in the back of her throat as her eyes fell over the grotesque features of Olivia Benson.  
  
The blonde waited silently for the creature to stumble forward, she pulled the branch back before swinging forward forcibly with a grunt.  
  
Her eyes widened as the branch splintered upon impact, it had felt so much sturdier in her hands.  
  
The pale face loomed closer, the blow had barely caused the creature to stumble. Moving backward, Amanda almost forgot about the body that was on the ground behind her. She swore as her foot connected and she fell roughly to the ground.  
  
Her eyes widened as the previously blurred features came into view, the painfully contorted face of George Huang lay just inches away. His eyes blankly stared forward, mouth gaping in a silent scream.  
  
She was torn from the distorted features as she felt a sudden pain blossom across her shoulder and a weight tipping against her lower body. She tried to fight off the sickly and infected form of herself but it was useless. Although the decaying flesh stripped easily from the bone with the help of her nails, the blonde couldn't out muscle the mindless creature. She cried out as it bit deeply into her left bicep and grit her teeth as she slammed her right hand down toward its head. There was a sickening squish as the branch sunk deep into the eye socket of her attacker but the pain it would have felt she felt instead.  
  
Amanda cried out again before everything went black, a searing pain flashing across her eye and forehead as she felt herself once again slip into darkness. She waited quietly, knowing that consciousness would soon come.  
  
She was jolted from sleep suddenly, her heart racing. Sweat made her hair cling to her face and neck, she breathed in deeply. She took in as much of the cool air from her apartment as she could.  
  
She jumped again as knocking sounded on her door, glancing toward her kitchen she frowned as she read the time. 1 a.m.  
  
Swearing under her breath as she crawled out of her warm little nest and made her way quickly to the door. She double checked that her gun was hidden and within reach before lining her eye up briefly with the peep hole.  
  
Her eyes widened and she instantly moved to slide the chain lock free before moving onto the deadbolt and finally, the lock on the door knob.  
  
"Olivia?" She asked as she peered around the door, the brunette flashed her a wide smile.  
  
"Sorry, I know it's late." The older woman replied, walking passed Amanda and into the blonde's apartment once she pulled the door open wider.  
  
As Olivia passed, Amanda noted the strong smell of alcohol that accompanied her.  
  
A blush tinted the shorter woman's cheeks as she took in the brunette's expression, none of her coworkers other than her partner had seen her apartment before.  
  
"This is a nice place you've got." Olivia said, taking in the quaint but homey rustic feel of the exposed brick and stained wood.  
  
"Thanks... It's a work in progress, as I'm sure you can tell." Amanda replied, rubbing gently at the back of her neck.  
  
"Yeah but it's coming along well, are you doing it all yourself?" The woman asked, a hint of surprise in her voice. She stared at where the older wood met the freshly stained wood panels before they were swallowed up by the shadows leading back into the kitchen and the hallway beside it.  
  
"Yeah, slowly but surely... Kind of my project outside of the job, I usually get up early and do a little before work and leave the windows open."  
  
"Ah, that's why it's so cold in here." Olivia said, another smile catching her lips as she turned to face the younger woman. She couldn't help but notice the blonde's lack of clothing, she guessed she'd caught her sleeping. Her eyes swept over the athletic form quickly, worried she might be caught if she lingered. She traced up the long and well muscled legs. Her pulse quickened as her eyes moved passed the small boy short panties and up, along what she could see of the toned stomach.  
  
Amanda caught the tail end of the brunette's staring and suddenly became very aware of not only the temperature but also her lack of pants and bra.  
  
Goose bumps immediately began to spread over the exposed portions of her body. "Make yourself at home! I was just getting ready to start some tea, would you like some?" She lied, fumbling over her words as she turned to deadbolt the door while they talked.  
  
"Water, please?" Olivia asked as she took a seat on the smaller of the two couches, her eyes took in the crumbled blanket on the other.  
  
Amanda nodded, mentally smacking her forehead for not offering that first. She hurriedly filled her tea kettle before placing it on the stove, she then turned and fetched one of her nicer glasses. She filled it from the small water dispenser on the front of her refrigerator.  
  
"I'll be right back."  
  
Olivia nodded her thanks for the water, sitting back again and watching as the younger woman disappeared back the hallway.  
  
She emerged several minutes later, now sporting a pair of running shorts and a pull over hoodie. Olivia took another sip of her water as Amanda's attention was quickly diverted back into the kitchen as the tea kettle began to whistle.  
  
"Sorry... I'll be out in a sec." The blonde mumbled, blushing slightly and tucking a stray piece of hair back behind her ear.  
  
Olivia chuckled, "It's okay really, I should be the one apologizing again for how late it is." She reassured, pointedly averting her eyes as the younger woman headed back to the kitchen. She knew she'd been caught the last time, she didn't want to risk it again.  
  
She pinched the bridge of her nose, slamming her eyes shut. What was going on?  
  
Her mind drifted back to the conversation not so long ago with George, "I just got the vibe from her when I was talking to her earlier, my gaydar is usually pretty spot on."  
  
'Well, if she is gay... Blatantly staring at her whether you're drunk or not is definitely not going to send the signal you're intending to.' Olivia thought, trying to shake herself out of the odd mood.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
Olivia looked up, Amanda was just taking a seat on the larger couch. She was careful to not spill any of the hot tea from her mug as she did.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little tired." She chewed on her lip for a moment, carefully selecting the words she was about to say. "I wanted to apologize." She began, her eyes staying planted on the clear liquid moving gently in her glass.  
  
Amanda's brows furrowed, "For what?" She asked, taking advantage of the brunette's pause.  
  
"For my behavior... Toward you." Olivia said, mentally cursing as everything she had intended to say came out in pieces.  
  
Amanda sat back, steam gently moving passed her face. The smell of the peppermint helping to calm her own nerves as she waited for the other woman to continue.  
  
"It was wrong for me to treat you so coldly, especially since you treated me with nothing but kindness and respect..."  
  
Amanda smiled, warmth was budding in her chest at the apology. Although she hadn't been expecting it at all.  
  
"You have nothing to apologize for, I know what was going on... You were upset-"  
  
"That's no excuse. I was unprofessional, I had no reason to treat you or Amaro the way that I did."  
  
They sat in silence for a few seconds before Amanda's soft voice answered, "Apology accepted."  
  
Olivia raised her brown eyes to meet the blue ones watching her intently, she wanted to argue and apologize more. But she realized that it was probably a combination of the lingering alcohol in her system and her stubborn nature. She really had wanted a better relationship with the younger woman and she had been flattered when Amanda had complimented her past cases on her first day.  
  
She wondered, how things would have been if she hadn't acted like such a bitch. She took another sip of her water, trying to calm and rid her body of the effects of the alcohol that still lingered.  
  
She could feel that Amanda's eyes were still watching her, a warmth began to spread up the back of her neck. She glanced toward her watch, "I should go, sorry again for stopping by so late..."  
  
"Olivia, it's okay." Amanda said, placing her mug down on a coaster on the coffee table in front of her. She caught the older woman's arm as she moved to rush toward the door, "Hey, wait."  
  
Olivia looked at her sheepishly, the behavior was odd for the brunette. Definitely not something the younger woman was used to, "You should stay here tonight, it's late. You can have my bed, I'll stay out on the couch. I'll take you to your place in the morning so you can shower and grab a fresh pair of clothes." The blonde offered, her voice soft.  
  
Olivia chewed on her lip, fighting down the urge to blush as best she could. "It's okay, I can make it home alright."  
  
Amanda frowned slightly, "Olivia, please. With all of these attacks that have been going on... I'd feel a lot better if you didn't go out again tonight, plus you shouldn't be driving..."  
  
The brunette chuckled suddenly, "I didn't drive. I promise."  
  
She watched as Amanda crossed her arms, obviously she wasn't going to take no for an answer. "Okay, I'll stay."  
  
Amanda smiled, her features brightening considerably once the brunette gave in.  
  
"But you're sleeping in your own bed." Olivia said, her voice hinting that she wouldn't change her mind this time.  
  
"Really, I don't mind... The couch is really comfy." The brunette held back a chuckle, she guessed that the blonde had been intending on sleeping on the couch anyway.  
  
"You need your rest, take the bed."  
  
xxx  
  
"Do you need anything else?" Amanda asked, rubbing at her neck as she looked over the couch. She had gotten a pillow, fixed the comforter and refilled the other woman's water.  
  
"No, I can't think of anything" Olivia responded, placing her neatly folded clothing on the shorter couch.  
  
Amanda couldn't help but take a moment to admire how Olivia looked in her sweat pants and T-shirt. The baggy pants were a little too long for her but they fit the brunette perfectly. The shirt however was a little small, accenting the other woman's bigger bust.  
  
"Well, just let me know if you do need anything." She said, a faint blush coloring her cheeks as she flashed a smile Olivia's way before heading back to her bedroom.  
  
xxx  
  
Amanda groaned, her eyes fluttering open as she tossed and turned. She was tired but she couldn't seem to get comfortable. She had set the bed up as soon as she'd moved in, but the piece of furniture was right next to the window. It had been the only practical place to put it with the closet door and bedroom door being located where they were.  
  
She could see the shadow of the fire escape on the blinds, her mind beginning to go over all of the possible scenarios of someone breaking in.  
  
Her thoughts were cut short, as a sound in the opposite direction caught her attention. She watched her door, which was open just a crack. After several minutes of silence she laid back down.  
  
Her mind was finally getting ready to give into sleep when she heard another creak of the floor boards. She moved to open her left eye but the heavy and stubborn lid refused to lift. Snuggling deeper into the covers the woman shook it off before she again became alert.  
  
She felt the bed shift slightly and finding this hard to ignore the blonde propped herself up on her forearms.  
  
"Olivia?" She asked, not even attempting to hide the surprise in her voice.  
  
"I couldn't sleep and I could hear you tossing and turning in here... Thought maybe you couldn't either." The brunette responded, still seated toward the lower end of the bed.  
  
Amanda gulped, grateful for the darkness that surrounded them. She could feel her cheeks burn as her mind began to race, this time playing out a bunch of completely different scenarios.  
  
"Amanda?" Olivia asked, leaning in toward the younger woman. The small stream of light coming in from the window catching her face as she did. "Are you tired?"  
  
Amanda remained silent for a moment, her throat dry. "No." Not anymore.  
  
Her pulse began to speed up as she saw the brunette's cheeks turn up into a smile, the woman began a slow approach.  
  
Without a word Olivia pushed her back down onto the bed, her warm lips brushing against Amanda's. The blonde's eyes fluttered shut, her hands made their way to the other woman's sides as she positioned her body above her.  
  
They broke the kiss, breathing a little harder than before. Amanda blinked, taking in what little she could see of the scene that was unfolding. Olivia was straddling her now, the smile still covering the lower half of her face.  
  
She lowered her body again, her nose brushing against Amanda's jaw line. Coaxing the blonde into turning her head, as soon as it was turned Olivia's mouth began moving against it expertly.  
  
Amanda watched the window through half lidded eyes, a small moan escaping her as Olivia nipped at her ear lobe.  
  
She arched slightly her mouth falling open again as she felt a warm hand moving down her tensed abdomen, "Relax..." A husky whisper breathed against her neck and ear, she shivered in response.  
  
She blinked trying to catch her breath as the other woman's hand slowly continued it's descent until fingers brushed gently against the waist band of her shorts. The younger woman's mind was buzzing, electricity sparking across her skin in a trail following the gentle finger strokes.  
  
Olivia slid her body down a little, her hand retracting briefly as she did. As she moved she brought her lips along the exposed expanse of neck before it, she smiled into the kisses as Amanda began to respond again. Her breath hitching and body squirming slightly beneath the brunette.  
  
Amanda was blushing furiously, her eyes were rolled back behind fluttering lids. She moaned again, louder as Olivia's sucked gently on her collar bone. She then continued her mouth's descent across the exposed and flushed skin of Amanda's chest.  
  
Her hand had returned to the blonde's hips, sliding beneath the fabric of the shorts. Her thumb teased the sensitive flesh there, moving painfully slow back and forth.  
  
The younger woman let out a shuddering gasp as the brunette's teeth teased her nipple through the thin fabric of her tank top.  
  
"'Liv..." Amanda whimpered, her eyes catching Olivia's as the woman looked up. She had smelled the scent of alcohol still clinging to the older woman's breath, the coherent part of her mind was focused on that. Was it the alcohol that was making this happen? Was she still drunk?  
  
Olivia's eyes remained locked with the blonde's, her fingers slipping a little further into the shorts. Amanda's back arched, her head falling back further into her pillow. And all thoughts of why it was happening disappeared.  
  
xxx  
  
Olivia's eyes snapped open, she sat up. Her ears straining to hear the sound that had woken her up. She could hear groaning and the rustling of covers coming from down the hallway, 'Amanda...'  
  
The brunette threw back the comforter, she got up quickly and made her way back to the blonde's bedroom.  
  
"Amanda, wake up. You're having a nightmare." She said in a soft voice, placing a firm hand on the girl's shoulder before shaking her gently.  
  
The blonde's eyes fluttered open slowly, a slow smile following. "'Livia?" She asked, her voice rough from sleep.  
  
"Yes, you were having a bad dream." The brunette repeated, retracting her hand and putting it on her lap. "Are you okay?"  
  
Amanda's brows furrowed, she pushed herself up on her forearms. "Yeah, I'm fine." She realized now that she'd been dreaming and that this was the first time the other woman had entered her room.  
  
"I just wanted to make sure... When I was outside your apartment earlier, when I first got here... I heard you cry out, I figured you'd been sleeping once I got inside and saw the blanket on the couch."  
  
"Yeah... I've been having some pretty intense dreams the last couple of nights... Sorry about that." She said, a blush coloring her cheeks. 'Good, at least she thinks it was a nightmare this time too.'  
  
Olivia reached her hand back over to grasp the younger detective's, her thumb moving gently across the back of Amanda's. "You'll probably have them for a while... But you're a strong woman, it will pass with time. I just wanted to make sure you were okay, sleep well."  
  
Amanda smiled, trying to ignore the electricity that shot through her hand at the affectionate but simple touch. "Thanks, you too. Night, Olivia."


	5. Wrong Move

Olivia groaned, burying deeper into the pillow as she heard the shower starting down the hall.

She remained still, listening to the sound of the water as she slowly became more and more awake.

She turned over slowly when she heard the water come to an abrupt stop, her hand reaching for her phone. She slid her finger across her screen, bringing a burst of light into the dark room. The brunette squinted as she tried to see what time it was, the digital clock read '5:12 A.M.'

Olivia's hand fell from the coffee table and dangled beside the couch, fingers brushing the floor.

She had to admit, she had a decent headache after her little trip to the bar. The water she'd had before bed had helped a little but she hadn't had enough of it before she'd fallen asleep.

Her right eye slowly opened again as she heard the bathroom door open but the light was quickly shut off. There was silence for a moment before the sound of bare feet padding across the hard wood met the brunette's ears.

Olivia fought down a chuckle as she realized Amanda was doing her best to not wake her. She felt guilt beginning to tug at her stomach as the younger woman mumbled a line of curses after knocking something over in the kitchen.

A light finally flickered to life from the other room and Olivia sat up slowly her eyes squinting as she tried to adjust to the sudden brightness.

The brunette made her way over to the kitchen quietly, pausing in the doorway where she could see the blonde moving quickly to start a pot of coffee.

"Morning." Olivia murmured with a yawn, her voice still husky from sleep.

Amanda jumped at the sound, her hand tightening on the top of her towel. "Oh, m-morning! I didn't mean to wake you... Sorry 'bout that." She stammered, turning away from the older woman in an attempt to hide her blush.

"Not a problem, I should probably be up soon anyway... If we're going to make it over to my place and still have time for you to beat Amaro to the precinct." She said, a smirk tugging at her lips. Amanda laughed, tucking some of her wet hair behind her ear.

"Yeah, you want a cup? I'll just start this and get dressed, then we can get goin'." The blonde said, looking over her shoulder for the response.

"Yes please." Olivia said, watching as Amanda measured the coffee grounds.

"Alright, I'm gonna go get dressed... It'll be a few minutes before I need the bathroom again if you want to freshen up." She said, her eyes only rising to meet the brunette's briefly before she averted them again.

xxx

The wind burned Olivia's eyes as she and Amanda exited the blonde's building, she moved to stand by the corner but Amanda caught her arm.

"Uh uh, I'm drivin'." She said with a crooked smile, Olivia frowned slightly.

"You really drive as much as you can, don't you?"

"I'm a big girl, I can handle it." Amanda scoffed, bringing her keys out of her pocket.

The brunette arched a brow but remained silent as the two of them made their way over to the buildings parking garage. If anything, the rickety old pick up looked even less impressive today. A yellow snow plough had been attached to the front, making it even more bulky.

"Sorry, I help out whenever the snows bad... Just did it the other day before work."

Olivia smiled, "Nothing to be sorry about, you're probably a good part of the reason I was able to get to work then."

The brunette hopped into the passenger side once Amanda had unlocked it for her. Despite the appearance of the trucks interior, it held a somewhat floral scent.

The two were quiet for most of the ride, the loud roar of the trucks engine keeping Olivia from drifting off in between sips of her coffee.

"You're down this way, right?" Amanda asked, her voice snapping Olivia out of her trance.

"Yeah, the building is pretty hard to miss... The garage is right there." She said, pointing to show Amanda where to turn.

xxx

Olivia smiled as Amanda finished locking up her truck, "Thanks for the lift, I'll have to give you a ride in my baby sometime."

The blonde blinked as she looked up, she blew a few stray strands of hair out of her line of view. "Oh? Which one is yours?" She asked, looking around at the cars parked on the older woman's floor.

"I'm parked on the end. Here, let me show you quick." The two made their way down to the other end of the floor and Amanda's eyes widened as they fell on the Mustang.

"You drive _that_?" She asked, her cheeks flushing as she considered what a sight that would be.

"You sound surprised..." Olivia said, a grin tugging at her cheeks as she placed a hand affectionately on the hood of her car.

xxx

Amanda smiled as Olivia handed her a fresh cup of coffee, "Make yourself at home. I'll be out in fifteen." The brunette said, turning to head back toward her bedroom.

Once Olivia had left the room, Amanda's eyes began to wander. She looked around the homey apartment, it was bright and clean. She sat on the couch a moment, nibbling at her lip as she took it all in.

In all honesty, her mind was anywhere but the decor and the paint job. She could hear the water starting towards the back of the apartment, her teeth worried her lip more as she frantically searched for something else to think about.

She rose quickly and made her way over to look at some of the pictures lining a shelf to the right of the couch. Her eyes immediately went to one where Olivia was smiling the widest. She was hugging a man, he was tall, his hair was short. They were both grinning widely and acting goofy. It was something that Amanda hadn't seen the older woman do since her arrival.

Her finger brushed the glass as recognition dawned on her, she let out a small sigh before moving to the next frame. This one was sitting horizontally on the shelf, the same man from before was now standing with a more refined smile. Olivia, John and Fin were standing close by, all with similar expressions.

Amanda continued on, her eyes glancing over the familiar features of Olivia's half brother. Her brows furrowed as she tried to remember his name, Simon Marsden? He was smiling with his fiancee, their children held between the two of them.

With two photos left, Amanda took her time looking over them. The next was an older woman with pale brown hair, she had a wide smile across her lips. But the closer Amanda looked at the photo, the more she felt pain from the woman's eyes. Her fingers once again brushed glass as she thought about the similar pain in Olivia's.

The last picture was the one closest to the end of the couch, it was an image of a young boy with short brown hair and blue eyes. Amanda could have sworn she'd seen him briefly around the precinct just around Halloween. He had stopped by with what she presumed to be his grandparents to say goodbye after Olivia had been pulled back into work on the missing baby case.

Realizing she'd already finished her coffee as she examined the pictures, Amanda made her way back into the kitchen. She rinsed her mug before filling it halfway with water, she'd barely taken a sip before she noticed a picture hung on the side of the refrigerator.

Her fingers tightened on the glass as she approached the picture, it was a drawing. Obviously by a child, her eyes traced over the signature in the bottom left hand corner. It read _'Calvin Benson.'_

She stared at it for a few seconds longer, her mind trying to work out why it wasn't on the front of the refrigerator. She moved back over to the sink to dump the little bit of water left in her mug when it hit her. Olivia had placed the drawing on the side so that she could see it while she made dinner.

The blonde was about to take a step back toward the drawing when Olivia cleared her throat, blue eyes flew to meet the brown ones watching her carefully.

"Uh, sorry. I came in to get myself some water..." Her voice trailed off as Olivia closed some of the space between them, her gaze moving to the drawing.

"You never met Calvin, did you?"

Amanda shook her head slightly, "Not officially, no. I saw him around Halloween though, in the precinct."

The older woman remained quiet for a moment, she looked down pushing a piece of stray hair behind her ear. "I was going to adopt him... But his mother decided to get back with her husband and they wanted Calvin back."

Amanda felt her heart breaking at Olivia's expression, she was at a loss for words. "I'm sorry Liv, I don't-"

"You don't have to say anything, I just wanted you to know." Olivia said, flashing her a smile. Her hand brushing Amanda's forearm as she moved passed her to the sink to rinse out her own mug.

The blonde blushed, the simple brushing of skin sucking the air from her lungs. Her mind drifted back to her dream, she tried to catch her breath as she took in Olivia's appearance. The brunette had selected a form fitting maroon button up with a black tank underneath and black slacks to wear to work.

Amanda licked her lips nervously before blowing a stray piece of hair from her face, "I'm gonna use your bathroom real quick."

"Alright, we can head out then, if you're ready." Olivia said, making her way passed the blonde to retrieve her jacket from the couch.

"Yeah, I am." Amanda managed out, trying to keep the blush on her cheeks from becoming anymore obvious.

xxx

The ride into the precinct had gone smoothly considering the morning traffic, Amanda looked down as her phone buzzed in her pocket.

As she was pulling it out she heard Olivia's go off as well, "Yours too?"

"Yeah, Cragen wants us in as soon as possible, guess it's good we're here." She said with a chuckle as the elevator doors opened, "Wonder what's up?"

Amanda shrugged as they walked down the hall towards their desks, "Dunno but it looks like we're 'bout to find out."

Olivia looked up as they rounded the corner to enter the squad room, her eyes surprised to find a stoney-faced Cragen.

"What's goin' on Cap'n?" Amanda asked, more than a little worried about his expression.

"Don't bother starting any work, as soon as the others get here you'll be heading out to see Melinda."

"A new case?" Olivia asked, her eyebrows raising in surprise.

"In a way but you won't be working it."

The two women exchanged glances but before they could ask any more questions, Amaro came up next to them. "What's going on?" He asked, sounding a little out of breath.

"You'll find out as soon as Munch and Fin get in here." Cragen said, his voice quiet and calm.

The detectives stood still, quietly waiting until the other two arrived. They knew by now that Cragen wasn't going to say anything else, not yet anyway.

"Glad you two finally made it in here. All of you head down to see Melinda, now." He said before turning back towards his office, Fin looked over toward Olivia.

"What's his problem?" He asked, his nose wrinkled slightly.

"No clue." Olivia said, her eyes darkening as she considered their captain's behavior.

xxx

As the detectives made their way down to the corridor that lead to the morgue, Melinda exited the room to meet them. Her eyes were red and she seemed hesitant to meet anyone's gaze.

"Melinda, what's going on?" Olivia asked, the woman blinked before looking up to meet the brunette's eyes.

"Follow me." She answered softly, leading them inside. She approached a coroner's table that was occupied by a covered body before coming to a stop.

"The body was found about an hour ago, the paramedics tried to get him to the hospital to be patched up... But he died shortly after they arrived and when Cragen heard who it was... He volunteered my services." Melinda said, her hand paused by the edge of the sheet before pulling it back.

Olivia gasped, her mind freezing up as she took in the corpse's features.

"I'm sorry Olivia..." The darker woman said softly, her normally stoic features contorted with sadness.

"No, it can't be... He was only two blocks away from his hotel." Olivia said, shaking her head as she tried to tear her eyes away.

Amanda frowned, averting her eyes from George's pale features. Her hand automatically reached for Olivia's, squeezing it gently in an attempt to comfort the older woman.

Olivia pulled her hand free before pushing passed Melinda to get a closer look at her friend, her vision grew hazy as she looked over the many injuries.

"Was it quick?" She asked, almost too softly for the medical examiner to hear.

"... I'm sorry to tell you this but it was not. Based on my findings I would say he died of blood loss, the uniformed officers that were first on the scene said it took them a while to find the location. A call was made after some people chased off his attacker, they said the man came after them instead but they managed to get inside their building and keep him out."

"So they never found the guy?" Fin asked, his voice a little harsher than he'd intended for it to be.

"They did and they put him down. Two shots to the torso and a third shot to the head." Melinda said, her eyes never leaving Olivia.

The brunette's jaw was clenched, her finger tips brushed the cool flesh of George's arm before she turned away.

She pushed passed the other detectives and paused at the threshold of the room, "Thank you, for doing this." She said softly, her eyes still lowered.

Melinda smiled but it didn't quite reach her eyes, "It was the right thing to do, he's one of our own."

Olivia nodded, she turned away from the others, her eyes burning as she walked into the hallway. Her fingers had just met the cool metal of the door knob leading to the stairs when she heard a loud scream from the examination room.

Her pulse began to pick up as she turned, her heels echoing as she made her way back to the others. A shot rang out, the sound almost made the brunette stop in her tracks. She hesitated a moment before taking the last few steps that brought her to the doorway.

Her eyes moved passed the detectives to where a bleeding Melinda was leaning against the examining table, the crumpled body of George Huang laying at her feet. Amaro and Munch had mad their way over to the M.E. to make sure she was okay, Fin was by Amanda. The blonde was shaking, her gun still clutched tightly between white knuckled fingers.

Before the brunette could react two people moved passed her in camo, their guns raised as they cautiously assessed the situation. They turned their guns on John and Nick, the woman nodding her head. "Get away from her, now."

The men raised their arms, "Hey, take it easy... We're cops." Nick said, moving his jacket back slightly so they could see his badge.

The woman shook her head, "That doesn't matter. She's been bitten, get away from her. Now."

Nick frowned but did as he was told, the two military officers moved forward their guns still pointed at Melinda. Olivia moved to step forward but she was cut off by a woman in a business suit.

"You were instructed to conduct an inspection of the brain on any deceased... Because of your failure to do so... You've signed your own death certificate." Melinda averted her eyes, her grip tightening on the bleeding section of her arm.

"I was trying to respect my colleagues... Give them a last glance at a friend without marring his face further."

The woman pursed her lips, turning to Melinda's assistant who had hesitantly peeked her head into the room from the other door. "We need this area cleaned and the body placed in a bag. Restraints may also be required... Unless," she said turning to her gaze back to Melinda. "you'd rather be put out of your misery now."


	6. Moving Forward

"And if I decline that offer?" Melinda asked, her voice holding a familiar edge to it.

"If you decline, we will study how your body responds to the fever and other changes. Then kill you before you turn completely."

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Olivia cried, her voice returning suddenly with an intense and burning anger.

The woman turned, her grey eyes narrowing as she stared the brunette down from several feet away. "Selene. I am the one who's here to keep this infection from spreading any further. There are rules that must be followed now, they will be the difference between life and death. For all of us."

"Olivia, it's alright. I knew the risks. I would like to offer myself as an example to be studied, we need to learn as much as we can about this infection."

Selene's expression softened at Melinda's words, "Good choice, thank you." It was then the woman looked back at the detectives, "I will come to speak with you all once we have this situation under control, my apologies for getting us off to a bad start. But survival comes before friendliness I am afraid. Once we have Dr. Warner set up you can come and visit her, maybe with a nice dinner." The woman suggested, removing her glasses before pinching the bridge of her nose.

"The precinct is being shut down as of today, Cragen will fill you in on more of the details... But all members of the police force will be uniting with the military for a city wide evacuation and quarantine of those who are already infected."

Olivia stared at the woman who refused to return her gaze to meet the detective's enraged eyes.

xxx

Cragen looked up as the door to his office opened suddenly, he sat back in his chair. Preparing himself for the earful he was about to get when he saw Olivia's expression.

"What the hell was that?" She cried, slamming the door behind her.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean, Olivia."

"Oh I don't know, the soldiers bursting into the morgue toting semi-automatic rifles?"

"Olivia... They only came down to introduce themselves-"

"They turned their guns on Melinda and essentially told us to get her a final supper."

"What?" The man asked, pushing back his chair before standing.

"George... He must have come back, I wasn't in the room when it happened. All I heard was a shot go off and when I went to go see what was happening the soldiers rushed passed me. Melinda was bitten."

Cragen's face grew notably pale, "If she didn't follow protocol... Then there isn't anything we can do for her, Liv. There is no cure to this infection, if she was bitten... She's done." He said, his voice sounding more than defeated.

"What is this captain? You seem to know an awful lot about this, given our friend from the CDC just arrived." The woman said, her voice growing harsh again as she stared him down.

"I don't know as much as you might think, only the basics..." Olivia could tell he had more he wanted to say but a small knock at the door ended the conversation instantly.

"Ah, good. This is where you disappeared to detective." Selene said as she opened the door, her gaze moved passed the brunette's glare to Cragen. "Captain, I think it's time we fill the detectives in on what's going on. Don't you?" She said, her voice calm and even.

The man nodded his bald head, organizing the papers on his desk before following the women back out into the squad room.

The room had grown pretty empty since the detectives had left for the morgue, there were only one or two uniformed officers still within view. They seemed to be collecting things from their desks in a hurry.

"I'm sorry that our first encounter today was so unpleasant, I promise I am here as a friend." Selene started, pointedly ignoring Olivia's eye rolling.

"The next few weeks will be a lot to adjust to and from here on out... Everything you know, everything familiar is going to be turned on it's head. The infection that has been spreading over the last two weeks does not have a cure, those infected... Although they may have the face of a friend, colleague, lover or family member... They are no longer those people. They have already died." She paused a moment, looking over the faces of the people watching her carefully.

"I can see that you have already lost someone close to you and I am very sorry for your loss but the losses will continue if we do not act. The city of New York has been deemed a 'hot spot' for the infection. Cases have begun to escalate and unless action is taken... It will quickly be overrun with the dead."

"What action is being taken?" Nick asked, Selene turned towards him.

"The city will be evacuated, there will be three evacuation points... The uniformed officers will be in charge of helping to not only spread the word and make sure people are evacuating but also to help my people check for infected. We've had to spread our man power out across the country to other hot spots and areas of interest. We're stretched very thin. Your job will be to help reconnect families if they get separated and also to help break the news... In the case of a discovered infected."

"I want all of you to go home and grab some essentials before it gets dark, you'll be staying in the crib tonight." Cragen chimed in, his tone serious. "If you'd like you can travel in pairs or on your own but if you leave at all after dark you must travel with someone else. Non negotiable."

Olivia frowned, leaning heavily against one of the desks as she thought about everything that had already happened that morning. She blinked when she felt a gentle touch on her shoulder, "Hey, want to go with me?"

The brunette turned her head slightly to meet the blue eyes that had been watching her. "Yeah, sure." She responded, moving to grab her coat.

"Oh, and Olivia. Don't bother getting food for Melinda... I am going to be contacting her husband so that he can come and visit her before she get's too bad."

Amanda frowned as she watched Olivia nod her head before exit the squad room without any other interaction, "I'll catch y'all later."

The blonde hurried to catch up with the older woman, she was surprised to see that Olivia had already made it down to the other end of the hallway. She was waiting patiently by the elevator, "Liv... I'm sorry."

"For what?" The brunette asked, exasperation thick in her voice. "Sorry."

"For Melinda... I didn't draw my gun fast enough."

Olivia blinked, remembering that Amanda had been the only one with a gun drawn when she had gone back to the morgue.

"No, you handled yourself perfectly. You couldn't have known he would come back."

When Amanda didn't respond Olivia glanced towards the younger woman, her blue eyes were intently staring at the floor. A deep frown engulfed her features, "Amanda... It's not your fault. It had to be done."

"I know. It's just... Strange. He was there just yesterday, talkin' to me. When he came back..." She shivered, "It wasn't him but it _looked_ like him."

Olivia's jaw clenched as she watched anguish and confusion set in to the eyes of the woman next to her, as if on instinct her hand reached out. She held onto the blonde's hand, squeezing slightly as the elevator opened with a ding.

xxx

Several hours had passed since Amanda and Olivia had left the precinct,they'd made it back just before eight. The two exited the elevator, shouldering duffle bags containing a combination of clothing, toiletries and food.

As they entered the squad room, Olivia's brows hiked up on her forehead. Fin, Ken and Munch were sitting in a circle of chairs talking in the corner and Nick was kneeling next to his daughter. Maria looked up as she noticed the women coming into the room, "Hello! Long time no see." She said, flashing a smile.

Amanda nodded flashing one of her own, "Yeah, really! It's nice to see you."

The two hurriedly made their way over to the refrigerator to deposit what little cold food they had brought before moving back over towards the others.

"So you're still on duty?" Olivia asked as she took in the uniform, Maria nodded.

"Yes, they're trying to keep as many of us with our families as possible... I had to fight for this spot though, let me tell you." She said, placing a hand on Nick's shoulder.

"I'm glad you did, and I'm sure Zara is too." He said, ruffling his daughter's hair before standing back up.

The chatter around the squad room grew quiet as Cragen popped his head out of his office, "Good, you're all back. Why don't you guys go get comfortable and I'll let you know when Mr. Warner is done visiting Melinda."

Amanda moved to follow Olivia as they headed up towards the crib, the others decided to linger in the squad room a little longer since they had already set themselves up upstairs.

"Looks like we get the bunks in the back." Olivia commented, Amanda shrugged off her bag as they reached their beds.

"Nothin' wrong with that, means we'll be the last to get attacked if someone breaks in." She joked, "Do you want the top or bottom?"

"I'll take bottom if you don't mind." Olivia said, setting her bag down on the bed to solidify her choice.

"Good, I'm more of a top kinnda girl anyway."

She hid her grin as she lowered her bag to the floor, missing the quickly cocked brow from Olivia.

xxx

Amanda's eye cracked open as she heard the bunk beneath her creak, she remained still for a moment. It had been several hours since the others had made their way back upstairs, they'd all quickly set themselves up for bed before the lights had gone out.

The blonde had laid in silence for a while, her eyes trained on the dark ceiling. Occasionally she'd see the dim light of Olivia's phone flash to life as she waited and impatiently checked for a message from Cragen.

Sitting up only when the door was shut again the blonde debated a moment on what she should do.

Biting her lip, Amanda quickly ascended the small ladder and made her way out of the crib to follow Olivia. She guessed that the older woman had gotten impatient enough to go down to check in on Melinda herself. Amanda moved quietly, making sure to keep herself distanced far enough back that Olivia wouldn't catch onto her tailing her.

The blonde watched from the glass window at the exit of the stairwell as Olivia peeked her head into the morgue, there was a pause before the brunette disappeared into the room.

Quietly opening the door, Amanda made her way over to the windows to the morgue. Although the blinds were down they were not completely closed, she watched as Olivia pulled a chair up to Melinda's bedside. Her hand finding her friend's and holding it tightly. Blue eyes rose briefly to take in the relaxed posture of the two soldiers still stationed in the room.

After a few minutes of watching in silence, the blonde turned away from the window. She felt as if she were intruding on a private moment between the two. She was a colleague of Melinda's but she had known her for only a little over a year at this point, she had nothing close to the relationship Olivia had with the other woman.

Amanda made her way back upstairs, her pace slowing as she reentered the squad room. She pushed her hands into the pockets of her sweat pants as her eyes swept the room. She hadn't been here long but she felt a sort of empty weight settling in her chest at the thought of leaving. She gave a wistful sigh before making her way over to her desk, her finger tracing the pattern in the wood grain.

xxx

Olivia allowed herself a small smile as she made her way towards the squad room, her visit with Melinda had comforted her a lot about the situation. The medical examiner seemed calm and at peace, especially now that she'd been able to say goodbye to her family. She had told Olivia with a smile that they would be in the first group to be evacuated and that Cragen would be personally making sure they got out of the city.

Olivia's eyes widened slightly as she came into the squad room, "Amanda?"

"Huh? Oh, hey." The blonde responded, lifting her head from her desk.

"What are you doing up?" Olivia asked, making her way over to the younger woman.

"Just... Wanted to get one more look at this place before everything changes... Ya know?"

Olivia's head bobbed in a small nod, "Yeah, I know what you mean."

Amanda raised her eyes to admire the brunette's profile while she was looking over the squad room, "How was she?"

"She was... The fever has started to get worse but she's at peace with it. Seeing her family really helped her I think."

Amanda nodded, her teeth worrying her lip. She wanted to ask more but she didn't want to ruin the good mood that Olivia seemed to be in. Instead she pushed back her chair and rose to her feet.

"C'mon, let's get some sleep." She said with a smile, the brunette returned it before following her back up to the crib.

xxx

Olivia leaned heavily against her desk, her eyes focused on Selene. It was noon and although the detective had slept perfectly well the night before she couldn't help but feel a bit fatigued listening to the other woman talk.

"We're going to have quite a bit of people moving through our evacuation space... Some of which may have been bitten or scratched. Your job will be to break the news to the family of the infected once the infection has been confirmed."

Amanda sat back in her chair, rubbing at the back of her neck. "And what's going to be done with the infected?"

Selene's grey eyes flicked over to meet the blonde's, "That's not anything you have to worry yourself with, believe me. Dealing with their families will be enough."

She looked over her glasses at the rest of the detectives, scanning each face as she continued. "These people are scared, very scared as you already know. They will most likely become irate when they learn we will be keeping one of their loved ones from leaving with them... And even more so if they realize it is the last time they will see them. I know you can all handle yourselves, your cases have been handled very well from what I hear. Good luck. We'll be moving out within the hour."

Cragen stepped forward, a small smile gracing his lips. "This is the last time I am going to see you guys for a while. I will be moving to the first evacuation route but I will be detoured to the same military camp as all of you. I know I will see you guys there, just... Be safe. Alright?"

The detectives smiled, slowly rising from their seats to bid their farewells to their captain.

Once Selene and Cragen had exited the room Maria and the other two military officers stepped forward. "Please decide who is going with who as far as vehicles go and make sure you have all of your belongings together now."

Amanda glanced over towards Olivia before making her way over to the brunette, "Hey, who are you guys ridin' with? I can fit someone in with me."

Fin shrugged, "Ken, Munch and I were gonna hitch a ride in the van with Amaro and Zara."

Olivia smiled, "Guess it's us girls then. Sounds good to me."

Amanda smiled inwardly as she tried to ignore the fluttering in her chest, she reached down to grab her bag and wait for the cue to leave.

xxx

Olivia lay still in her cot, the woman and the men had been separated in the small building that would act as the third evac. station. Maria lay nearby with Zara, reading her daughter a bedtime story in a hushed tone. Amanda was curled up asleep on her cot and the other military officer, Michelle was cleaning her gun.

Suddenly a commotion broke out down the hall, there was a loud clash of metal followed by screaming.

Olivia jumped to her feet, her heart dropping as she raced towards the sounds. Michelle was right behind her, pistol in hand.

Amanda sat up groggily, glancing over towards Maria in confusion. The woman looked pale, her lips drawn into a small frown as she cradled Zara close.

"What's going on?" Olivia cried as she approached the quarantine section of the building, Michelle's brother Rodger shook his head.

"I'm sorry ma'am, Dr. Warner has begun to show signs of aggression..." His voice held a warning tone to it, as if she should stay back. Olivia stared at him in shock for a moment before pushing past, her eyes beginning to burn as she made her way towards where she knew they were keeping Melinda.

Selene frowned as she saw Olivia approaching, "I would advise that you not go in there." She said, her tone serious. The detective glanced passed her towards the curtain that was obstructing her view.

"What's happening?" She asked, not trying to conceal the disdain from her voice.

"The doctor is inspecting her brain while she's sedated, then she will be-"

"Killed, I know. I want to see her."

Selene frowned, her eyes moving passed Olivia and towards the approaching footsteps.

"Liv... You don't want to see her like that." Amanda said as she drew closer, her hand brushing Olivia's arm.

Olivia shook her head, "No, I need to. I need for all of this to feel real." She said, pulling her arm away slowly. Her eyes found Amanda's for a second before she pushed passed Selene and into the curtained off section of the room.

Her stomach immediately clenched as she noticed the opened state of Melinda's skull, the doctor barely looked up as she entered. His tools moving carefully around his patient's brain as he inspected the damage caused by the infection. Olivia noted the small metal tray on the floor by the bedside, several knives and other tools scattering the floor.

She stepped over them carefully, using them to keep her eyes from going back to the exposed section of her friend's head as she approached the metal table.

Melinda's arms were strapped down by thick straps, three on each arm, three on each leg, two across her midsection and one across her neck. Although sedated she appeared to have remained awake, her mouth twitching as she attempted to move it. Her red brimmed eyes moving slowly back and forth until Olivia entered her line of view.

The gaze that held her own was chilling, Olivia fought the urge to shiver as her mere appearance brought out some movement from the creature watching her.

The doctor paused in his inspection to watch his patient's reaction to the newcomer, "It's a lot like rabies you know... Eating away at the brain until the host becomes so lost in pain they become someone else... It quite literally drives them mad. They become sensitive to light, sound... Touch."

Olivia's eyes raised to meet his as he continued, "Actually, in some ways diseases like these are very interesting... In most rabies cases a calm and nice creature will become cruel and aggressive. While a creature of the same species who is already aggressive becomes sweet and docile before passing away. Not in the case of this disease though, this one triggers only aggressive behavior."

"Is she in pain now?" Olivia asked, her voice soft.

The older man pursed his lips for a moment as he considered her question, "To be honest... I am not sure. We have her sedated and although we are using some painkillers there is no way to really tell based off of her brain's responses if she is still feeling pain. If I were a guessing man however... My answer would be yes."

Her eyes drifted back to the blood shot ones watching her, the iris and pupil had begun to gather a milky film. She stared sadly at the mere shell of the woman she'd known for so many years, her hand itching to reach out and stroke the other woman's arm. But her limb remained fixed at her side, "How will you do it?"

The man's eyes softened above his white face mask, "I've just about finished this portion of my inspection. Normally one bullet to the brain would suffice but rather than waste one here... I was planning on a quick pierce with this." He said, bringing forth a somewhat long and sharp looking knife.

Olivia nodded, her eyes once again meeting Melinda's as the man prepped himself to slide the blade into her brain.

"Goodbye." Olivia whispered, her voice barely audible as she watched the life slowly leave the eyes watching her own.


	7. Shell Shocked

Amanda leaned back against the wall of the small examination room, her arms folded across her chest.

They were on the last family that was to be evacuated from the city and she was looking on as Selene checked the teenage daughter for any bites or scratches.

The girl seemed nervous, she was fidgeting a lot as Selene carefully checked her scalp and neck.

Amanda watched the CDC representative moved onto the girl's shoulders and arms, "Could you remove your shirt and bra for me please, dear?"

The girl nodded, a blush tinting her cheeks as she slid the red tee over her head before placing it on the bench next to her. Her bra quickly followed and she covered her chest as soon as Selene's eyes moved on to inspect her back.

Amanda frowned, she desperately wished that she could comfort the girl. The children had been some of the saddest to watch during the evacuation process. Especially those too young to understand what was going on.

They had to be separated from their parents in the chance that they had contracted the infection, it made it much easier to not only keep them calm but also to keep the parents from becoming violent.

She looked back up as the girl was instructed to put her top back on before removing the clothing for her lower half. Although she quickly replaced her bra and top, she grew hesitant after that.

"Are you sure I have to do this?" She asked in a small voice, her eyes flicking up to meet Amanda's.

Selene smiled softly, "Yes honey, we just have to make sure you're not sick."

The girl nodded and a small frown graced her lips as she brushed a blonde lock behind her ear. "O-okay..."

She moved slowly to unbutton her pants, unzipping the jeans before letting them fall to her ankles. As she stepped out of them the two older women paled at the sight of a gauze covered section of her lower left leg.

"Susan, what's that from?" Selene asked, her voice losing the sweetness from before.

The girl's mouth opened a moment before she closed it again, "I fell climbing on some rocks with my friends... Cut it up on the way down." She lied, her voice trembling slightly.

Amanda's jaw tightened, a thick cloud of nausea rushing her senses.

"I'm going to need to see it." Selene said, her hand reaching toward the medical tape holding down the gauze.

"No!" Susan cried, her hand smacking Selene's away. The brunette narrowed her eyes before nodding toward Amanda, a sign that she wanted assistance.

Amanda gulped down an argument before moving over to them, "Please hon, just let her take a look... I don't want to have to restrain you." Amanda pleaded, her heart breaking at the panic in the younger woman's eyes.

Susan lowered her head, giving it a small bob before turning it away from Selene.

The brunette mouthed a quick thank you to Amanda before gently pulling the tape away from the skin and her lips pulled into a frown at what laid beneath.

Selene rose from her kneeling position and nodded to Amanda, "I'm going to need for you to stay in here Susan, your parent's will be in shortly to see you."

Amanda gave the girl a sad smile before following Selene out of the room, the blonde was surprised to see the others already waiting outside.

Selene signaled for two of the military officers who had come from the other evacuation points to escort the parents in, Amanda hesitated for a moment before following her.

"Hey, I have a question for you..."

Selene stopped walking and turned, a slender brow arched. "Yes?"

"What are yall doin' with the people in mental hospitals and prisons?" She asked, her voice almost hesitant. Selene's brow immediately fell, both drawing together. She turned without a word and continued walking toward her make shift office.

"What the hell? Answer me!" Amanda cried, walking after her. Olivia frowned at the outburst and quietly excusing herself from the others to go see what was happening.

Selene reached for the handle of her office door but found Amanda's hand holding it shut, "I said _answer me_." The blonde hissed, her voice deepening drastically.

"Amanda?" Olivia asked, a little surprised by the display of aggression from the younger woman.

Selene's eyes moved over to Olivia before flicking back to Amanda, "Can this wait?" She asked, Amanda shook her head, her hand slamming into the door before reapplying pressure.

"No, it can't. And I'm sure Olivia would like to hear the answer as well... Her brother is in jail here in the city."

Selene swallowed hard, her cheeks and neck slightly flushed. "They aren't being evacuated."

"Why not?" Amanda said, easing off of the door and folding her arms across her chest.

"...People are infected and trying to eat each other, it's only a matter of time before non infected become hostile. Fighting over supplies, vehicles, weapons... The last thing we need are criminals running around with them. The more we can keep out of the mix the better."

"What about the people who are in for non violent crimes?" Olivia cried, her voice rising a little louder than intended. The talking from down the hall grew quiet at the outburst but no one moved to approach.

Selene's eyes moved toward where she knew the others would now be listening from, "There wouldn't have been enough time to sift through their files..."

"Why not? What's the rush, you're here to _save_ people... Aren't you?" The blonde asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Selene ran her tongue over her teeth, her eyes clamping shut as she prepared herself for the response she knew would come. "They're going to bomb the city, they will be doing the same for all hot spots-"

The air was pushed from the woman's lungs in a violent gasp as she was shoved into the door. Amanda's fists were wrapped tightly in the collar of her shirt, "What did you just say?!"

Selene stared at her apathetically, her lips remaining in their tight line. "What about Atlanta?" Amanda asked, deciding to try something a little different. The blonde's voice held an almost frantic tone now.

"It was also deemed a hot spot, most of the big cities were."

"What about the mental patients, not gonna look through their files either?"

Selene shook her head, "No and they're better off that way. Would you want whoever it is that is close to you being off of their medication... Which they would run out of, wandering the streets and not knowing what is going on?"

Amanda didn't respond to the question, instead she asked another of her own. "How long do we have?" She asked, her voice noticeably softer as the sound of approaching footsteps echoed down the hall.

" ...Less than three hours to get out of the city and far enough away to not have to worry about backlash."

"Woah, what's going on over here?" Nick asked as he approached, his eyes going from one woman to the next.

"We got it Nick, we're done here." Olivia said, placing a gentle hand on Amanda's shoulder as the blonde released Selene.

"Yeah, we are." Amanda said, turning to leave with the older woman.

xxx

Olivia glanced toward Amanda as they rode in silence, she had just woken up when the pick up had gone over a large bump. The blonde's expression didn't seem to have changed during her nap, her eyes flicked over to the digital clock. They had left the evacuation building almost five hours earlier, only after the family had said their goodbyes to Susan.

The emotional mother and father had barely managed to climb into the military vehicle with two other families who had passed inspection to be transported to the military camp.

The detectives had remained silent as they loaded their belongings into their vehicles, no one dared to comment on the shots heard toward the back of the building. Or the fires seen in the rear view mirrors as they pulled away from the building and out of the city.

When they'd first left, Amanda had been sitting rigidly in her seat. Her knuckles white and jaw set as she drove. Instead of trying to strike up conversation, Olivia had stared out the window until she had drifted off.

The streets had looked eerily calm, most of the initial evacuations had allowed people to take their vehicles with them. It had been a week since then and although they hadn't been involved in the initial evacuation, they had seen the consequences of the civilians fear.

"I'm sorry about Simon." Amanda said suddenly, the gentleness of her voice seemed to seep into her posture. She flexed her right hand as it fell from the steering wheel and put her elbow on the armrest.

"It's not your fault... I wouldn't even know what was going to happen to him if it weren't for you." Olivia responded, her gaze now out the window. "Who were you asking about?"

Amanda's eyes met hers for a moment, "My little sister, Kim. She's been troubled for a long time... Not long before I left Atlanta I asked that she check herself into a mental hospital so she stayed on her meds and didn't get herself into trouble. If I hadn't she would have been evacuated like everyone else..."

"Amanda, that's not your fault. You didn't know this was going to happen."

The blonde gave a small sigh of relief when the walkie talkie next to her in the center console burst to life with a shock of static.

"Hey, we're going to stop here for the night. Stay in your cars and only go out if you need to." Michelle's voice said as they pulled off the road and into a small clearing.

"Where do you think we are?" Olivia asked as Amanda turned her truck to follow.

"Somewhere in Maryland, apparently the big base they want all of us to meet up at eventually is in North Carolina."

Olivia nodded as the truck jerked to a stop, "So we should be able to make it there tomorrow, great." She said, trying to sound at least somewhat optimistic.

"You have to go to the bathroom?" Amanda asked as she turned off the engine, Olivia nodded.

"Yeah, probably should... Especially if we're going to have to stay in the truck all night."

The two hopped out of the truck after grabbing some toilet paper and using the darkness to their advantage, they only had to go to behind the vehicle. One of them kept watch while the other relieved themselves.

The two of them hopped back into the vehicle after, locking their doors once they were inside. Amanda let out a small chuckle to herself as she took the lid off of her water bottle.

"What is it?" Olivia asked, settling into her seat.

"I feel like I'm a teenager again, sneaking out and tryin' not to be caught... I just peed in the grass behind my truck. If this situation wasn't so dire I'd probably laugh myself to death."

Olivia cracked a smile, seeing her point.

"Yeah, I can't say I've ever done that myself."

"What? Peed on the side of the road? Oh, ma'am you have not lived! Have you at least been camping?"

Olivia tried to hide her sheepish grin, "No, I haven't."

Amanda lightly smacked her with the back of her hand, "You're kidding!"

"Nope. I'm a city girl, born and raised."

"Camping was one of the few things my Daddy got right while he was alive... Good times. If we ever make it out of this apocalyptic bullshit I'll have to take you."

Olivia smiled wider now, "I'd like that."

The two women laughed for a while longer before Amanda finally began to feel tired, she gave a yawn and bid her passenger good night before they both settled deeper into their seats.

xxx

Amanda woke suddenly, yelling was coming from the walkie talkie on the center console. She picked it up in confusion, turning up the volume so she could make it out more clearly, "I need help out here. Got jumped when I took Zara out to go to the bathroom... in woods, hurry!"

Olivia was already reaching down to the bed of the truck to retrieve her shoes, coat and pistol when Nick's voice was lost in static.

Amanda followed her lead, slipping on her boots before picking up her coat and gun.

Just ahead of them the others were exiting their vehicles as well, Maria's face was pale as she hopped out of the military vehicle.

She broke into a sprint before disappearing into the woods, her pistol flashing as she pulled it from its holster.

xxx

"Zara! Sweetie, where are you?" Nick cried, his hands still bloody from the infected he had killed. The man had stumbled out of the shadows while Zara was going to the bathroom and the girl had fled in fear when the man had knocked Nick to the ground temporarily.

Unable to unclip his gun, he had instead pulled the hunting knife he was carrying out. With a grunt he'd managed to pull his arm free quickly enough to shove the blade deeply into the man's temple, killing him instantly. But to his horror, Zara had already disappeared.

It was dawn so visibility was limited, especially as he moved deeper into the woods along side the road. They had seen plenty of abandoned vehicles along both sides of the highway and he guessed that the man had probably stumbled out of one after either turning or crashing.

Fear gripped Nick as he desperately searched for his little girl and his heart skipped a beat as a loud scream echoed through the trees.

"Zara? Daddy's here, I'll be there in a second baby." He cried, pushing his burning legs to move faster. He could hear the others yelling faintly behind him but none of them were close yet.

There was a small break in the trees ahead and a flash of white in the high grass met his eyes. Zara was huddled in a ball, a man stumbling toward her.

Without needing to think, Nick unclipped his gun from its holster and took the man out in one shot. He moved to check on Zara but a groan from beside him almost made him stumble. The significantly closer woman clacked her jaws at him, bits of bloody flesh hanging from her maw.

"Shit!" He swore as he quickly adjusted his stance before making a second head shot.

He breathed heavily, sweat pooling on his forehead as he tested his ankle. Finding it was good enough to close the distance between himself and his daughter he quickly made his way to her side. She was laying face down, her body prone. He felt a cold fear running through his veins as he reached an unsteady hand out toward her.

"Zara?" He asked, his voice soft. He could now make out Maria's desperate cries above the others, she was getting closer.

His hand gently shook the small shoulder but he got no response. Turning her over carefully, Nick cradled the small body to his own. His chest and throat tightening as he took in the little girl's bloody neck and exposed clavicle.

Nick rocked back and forth, clutching Zara's body closer as he tried to control his emotions. Maria's voice was very close now and he did not know how he was going to face her.

Suddenly, without warning Zara's body gave a violent jerk. Nick sat back, his eyes wide. "Zara?" He choked out, the little girl's eyes were shifting quickly beneath her lids.

An inhuman gasp escaped the girl as her eyes drifted open, the air releasing from both her wound and her open mouth. Nick let out a sob as her milky eyes met his own before his hand moved slowly toward his pistol.

"I'm sorry baby girl..." He said, placing the barrel to her head as she turned to try to bite at him. The shot rang around him, temporarily washing out the nearby cries from Maria.

xxx

"Nick! Did you find her?" Maria cried, racing toward the shot as quickly as she could.

She slowed to a stop when she saw Nick sitting on the ground, cradling a small form to his own body.

"N-no...No." She whispered, her hand rising to her mouth as she fell to her knees.

Nick turned his head weakly, throwing the gun away from him in disgust.

Maria watched as the gun disappeared into the grass, the sight of the weapon seemed to trigger something within the mother.

"What did you do?" She shrieked suddenly, her voice cracking as she stumbled to her feet. The man shook his head, his body shuddering as he clutched Zara closer.

"I did what I had to... She wasn't our little girl anymore." He said, his voice rough with emotion as he buried his face into the top of the child's head.

There was silence for a moment only broken by the click of a hammer being brought back, Nick raised his head slowly.

"Maria?"

"What did you _do_?" She repeated, her voice stronger now.

"Baby, what are you doing...?" He asked, gently placing Zara's body on the ground.

"No. You don't get to call me that, not after what you did to _my_ child!" Maria spat, taking a step closer without warning.

xxx

"Did yall hear that?" Amanda asked, the faint sound of a gunshot meeting her ears. Olivia, Fin and Rodger nodded and they quickly moved to follow after the blonde as she broke into a full out sprint in the direction of the sound.

The others had remained back with the vehicles and Michelle had opted to stay with them in case something happened while the others were out.

Olivia panted as she tried to push her body to go faster but her attempts were futile, none of them could keep up with Amanda. The blonde had easily pulled ahead but abruptly came to a rough stop when two more shots rang out through the trees.

"Shit, that was close!" Fin said in between pants of his own, Rodger nodded. A deep frown tugged at the man's features as they advanced with more caution, all of them with their weapons drawn.

"Oh my god..."Olivia whispered, her heart clenching at the sight that they took in as they entered the small clearing. Maria was laying face up, the right side of her face distorted from the shot that had ripped through her skull. The gun was still half clutched in her hand and Nick lay several feet away. His legs beneath him from the kneeling position he had been in when he was shot.

Rodger pulled the walkie talkie from its holster at his side, "I'm sorry for your loss... I didn't know her for long but Michelle and I knew she needed to talk to someone... She was too worried about what people might think. But something was eating her since she came home, from what we could see." He whispered before turning his gaze away from the scene, his voice quietly echoing over the radio as he relayed what had happened.

Olivia fell to her knees in the grass, her gun arm limp at her side. Amanda just stared, shaking her head slowly as she tried to take it in.

Fin placed his hand on Olivia's shoulder, squeezing it gently as he felt her beginning to silently shake.

Finally regaining control over her limbs Amanda made her way over to Nick, her heart dropping as she noticed his glossy eyes staring up at the pinkish yellow sky.

The blonde knelt down next to him, her fingertips gently pulling his eyes closed.

She looked up, feeling powerless as emotion ran rampant through her body. She noticed the body of an unfamiliar man a few feet behind Zara, not far from where the trees grew more dense. Rising to her feet she quickly made her way over to it, her booted foot connecting heavily with it several times.

"Fucking _bastard_!" She cried, her voice breaking a little as she once again sunk down to the ground.

She stiffened when she heard a twig crunch behind her, "You shouldn't use guns. It brings in more of them."


	8. Sinking In

Amanda's eyes widened at the voice, she turned her head over her shoulder. Fear was tightening her chest as she realized the man behind her was holding a large, bloody axe.

She watched as he took a slight step back, his hands both raising. The one not holding the axe opening, palm out.

"Hey now... I'm here to help. I swear." She heard the tell tale click of a gun being cocked, the man's eyes shifted to hers in a pleading glance.

"Ty, what's going on?"

Olivia's gun lowered slightly, her brows furrowing at the new voice.

Suddenly a second figure came into Amanda's line of view, she immediately relaxed a small smile tugging at her lips. She rolled back onto her heels and rose to her feet.

"Casey?" The blonde asked, nodding as she passed the strange man.

"Well, well... Small world. Good to see you!" The red head said, a crooked grin tugging at her lips as she put her bat to her shoulder.

Amanda was grinning from ear to ear by the time Olivia made her way over, immediately pulling Casey into a tight embrace.

After a moment the brunette pulled back and began to inspect her friend for injuries.

"The blood's not mine, I promise." Casey said, her voice serious despite the smile still clinging to her lips. Olivia's brows rose up in surprise, the blue Sex Crimes jersey was barely recognizable by color anymore. It was also torn in some places, she probably wouldn't have recognized it had she not seen the ADA wearing it frequently in her earlier days with the unit.

Olivia shook her head slightly, trying to keep control of her emotions.

"We heard gunshots while we were out on patrol... What happened out here?" She said, noting the shift in expression at her question she moved passed Olivia. Casey's eyes widened as the clearing came into view, the bodies told her everything that she needed to know.

"...Was that detective Amaro's wife and child?" She asked, her voice soft.

Amanda nodded, wrapping a supportive arm around Olivia. "Yeah, Maria and Zara. From what we can gather... One of the infected came up on them when he brought Zara out to go to the bathroom, she must have been bitten after they were separated..."

Casey rubbed at the back of her neck, flashing Fin a small smile as he and Rodger approached. "I'm sorry for your loss, especially with a case like this... It's just awful." She raised her eyes to meet Olivia's, "We've got a camp a few miles down the highway, come back with us and we can get your vehicles later."

Ty shifted awkwardly behind them, his axe hanging by his side. Rodger stepped forward, his eyes never leaving the new man. "I can reach the others with my radio and have them meet us there, I'm guessing you know this woman?"

Olivia nodded, watching as Fin quietly headed over to not only pay his last respects but also to collect the two guns from the bodies.

"Yes, I worked with Sex Crimes. ADA Casey Novak, and you are?" The red head responded promptly, her hand rising in a peace offering.

"Rodger Santos ma'am, good to meet you." The man's features relaxed slightly, his hand taking hers in a strong shake.

"And this is my new pal, Ty. He's one of the people we met down here in Maryland actually, a lot better than the lot we had to tag along with from New York."

At the mention Ty tipped his ball cap hat, a shy smile tugging at his bearded features. "Nice to meet you."

"Who else is with you?" Olivia asked, hope seeping into her voice.

"You'll see when we get there, for now we've got to move out. With all of those shots fired I can guarantee that the dead will be on the move... Headed straight toward this location." She waved her hand back towards the directions she'd come from, "Our ride is this way."

Amanda nudged Fin as they came upon a 2011, all black, hard top Jeep Wrangler. "Wouldn't mind upgradin' to that." The blonde mumbled, her eyes tracing the body of the muddy Jeep.

Ty grinned as he walked passed them, pulling the keys from his jean pocket. "Took me forever to save up for this beaut, worth every penny. Only supposed to safely seat four but we'll make it work."

Ty hopped into the passenger seat, nodding as Fin and Rodger met at the back of the vehicle. "Latch should be unlocked back there, hop on in boys."

Amanda grinned giddily as she slid into the back seat, Olivia shook her head as she watched the younger woman inspect the interior with excitement.

xxx

About fifteen minutes after the Jeep had pulled off the highway the rest of the vehicles approached. A few of the people from the nearby camp poked their heads out of tents and around the vehicles that were parked in a circular fashion around the center where everyone was congregating.

Casey's nose crinkled as she watched the new vehicles roll into the grass.

"Who's the owner of that piece of shit?" She asked, amusement in her voice.

"Hey, that piece of shit is mine." Amanda responded, taking a few steps forward. Her voice only partially feigning injury as she made her way up beside the red head.

"Could you be more cliche?" Casey joked, putting her bat back up to her shoulder.

"It was my grandpa's back when we still had the orchard."

"Orchard?" Olivia asked, Amanda nodded. Glancing briefly towards the brunette as she approached.

"Yeah, we mainly grew peaches... Hence why I call it an orchard, had some other crops too... Up until my grandpa lost all his money."

Olivia gave a knowing nod, Casey was a bit lost and stared between the two of them in confusion. Having never caught wind of the blonde's gambling addiction.

"Guess the peach doesn't fall far from the tree." Fin said with a wide grin as he walked passed them to meet Ken and Munch.

Amanda glared after him, "Don't call me that. So uncreative!" She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest as he continued to walk ahead with a laugh.

Casey smiled at the interaction but her expression quickly fell as she noticed the unhappy faces of the people gathering around them.

"Who are these people?" A man in a ripped button up asked as he stepped forward from the others, Casey lifted a brow at him. "More survivors, from New York. They're here to help us, we could use more man power around here."

"Do they have food? We have too many mouths to feed as is..."

Casey narrowed her green eyes at him, "I'm sure they do and I'm sure they can also help us not only hunt but also keep watch so people can be more well rested too."

Ty stepped forward to back Casey up, "Plus... They're detectives. And I'm pretty sure that S.W.A.T vehicle is stocked, that means more weapons and ammo. We're going to need all the help we can get in the case of another horde."

Amanda frowned at the term but was happy to see that Ty's response had shut up the people watching them closely.

"Come on, let's get your stuff unloaded and see where you guys fit in for sleeping quarters." Casey said, following Amanda and Olivia over to the blonde's pick up.

xxx

"Sorry about before, everyone is just a little on edge..." Casey said as they made their way away from the parked vehicles and towards the vehicles lining the camp.

"It's okay, if I were in their shoes I would probably feel the same way about having strangers come into my living space... Given what's happened."

"We've only been here two days, it feels like it's been much longer."

"Why didn't you head off to the Maryland base? We're only a few hours out, we only stopped because of the time yesterday."

Casey remained quiet for a moment, she quickly made sure that not many others were around them. "We did. It was overrun by the time we got there." She shivered, slowing to a stop.

"It was awful, we could barely see anything because of the smoke... But all we could hear was gunfire and screams. We decided to backtrack to the highway hoping that we would run into another group."

The other two women nodded, their faces grim at the news.

The women continued walking for another couple of minutes before Casey approached a pale blue, grey and white tent. "Knock, knock." She said before tugging on the zipper.

"Casey? What was all that commotion about?" A groggy voice asked from within, Olivia's eyes widened.

"Alex? Is that you?"

A rustling sound came from the tent before Alex's head emerged from behind the flap of the tent, her hair was loosely tied back and her blue eyes were wide.

"Olivia! I'm so glad you're okay!" The taller blonde said as she stumbled out of the tent before wrapping Olivia into a tight embrace.

Amanda watched in silence, her eyes lowering to her feet after a moment. Jaw flexing and fingers fidgeting at the strap of her duffle bag.

Noticing the smaller blonde's discomfort, Casey cleared her throat. "Hey, how about we get these two set up inside and then relax? They've had a rough morning."

The other women nodded, slowly breaking their embrace. "It will be a tight fit but we'll make room for you guys. Come on in."

xxx

Amanda stretched, taking in the empty space on the other side of Olivia. The blonde's eyes paused a moment on the brunette, tracing the contours of the sleeping woman's face.

A small smile crept across Amanda's lips, her fingers gently brushing a stray piece of hair from Olivia's face. Although she didn't want to ruin the moment, she knew her body couldn't sleep anymore. Now that she was awake she was too curious about their new surroundings and what had happened at the military base.

The blonde heaved a small sigh before rising to her feet and ducking out of the tent, pulling the zipper shut quickly behind her.

She glanced down at her watch as she walked towards the center of the camp, hoping to see some familiar faces. It was already almost the evening, most of the day had been wasted sleeping after they'd unloaded their essentials and unpacked.

"Hey how'd you sleep?"

Amanda looked up, smiling as she saw Casey approaching. "Alright, it was a lot more comfortable than sleeping in my truck."

The red head grinned, slipping her arm though the blonde's and leading her over to where a large group was sitting and talking. "I figured as much. That's why we decided to let you guys sleep in a bit. Olivia still out?"

Amanda nodded, a little surprised by the close contact. Casey seemed to notice her discomfort and gave her arm a squeeze.

"What is it? Think I'm infected or something?" She asked with a laugh, almost immediately releasing the blonde.

"No, I just don't think I've ever seen you so... Chummy."

Casey nodded, "True. You've only seen me in my power suit, I almost forgot. But I'll have you know... I do have a personality outside of the courtroom, detective."

Amanda blinked, her pace slowing until she almost completely came to a stop.

"Hey, Amanda! Good of you to join us, where's 'Liv?" Munch asked, his eye brows rising above his glasses.

"She's still sleeping, how long have you two been up?" She asked making her way over to the older man and Fin.

"Never laid down, trying to get the scoop on what's been goin' on around here." Fin said, nodding towards the other people around them.

"Find anything out?"

"Not too much... Just that somethin' went wrong down here, they said they didn't hear any bombing. Ty says he's stayed in the area... He was helping out at the military camp when it went up in flames. Said he was coming back from patrol when he saw it and then happened upon Casey's group."

"Well, that was lucky." Amanda said, watching the man who was sitting on the outskirts of the group. He was quietly sharpening a blade, only looking up occasionally at those around him.

"Yeah, I was a little suspicious at first... But he seems like a genuinely good guy, especially if Alex and Casey trust him."

Munch nodded in agreement, "Some of these other guys though... I'm not so sure about." He said, his voice soft.

Amanda cocked her head slightly, "What do you mean?"

"They're all very jumpy, they just seem like... They'd be more eager to kill someone living than risk their own neck. No sense of honor or comradery."

Amanda chewed on her tongue for a moment, obviously taking in the information. "Yeah, they didn't seem too happy to see us comin' into camp. Guess that should have been the first clue."

"I don't think Alex and Case trust them either, we may have to try and convince them to split away from the group... I mean think about it. We've got some military, doctors and CDC employees and our group from Sex Crimes... That's a pretty solid team if we can keep it together. Especially with our weapon and fuel stock."

Munch nodded, eyes moving around warily to make sure no one was listening too closely. As luck would have it everyone seemed to absorbed in their own conversations to bother with the new comers.

"Where are our military and CDC friends?" Amanda asked, raising her voice a bit now that the more sensitive topics had been wrapped up.

"They've been in their vehicles, my guess is trying to figure out via radio what happened to that other military camp. Rodger seemed shocked when he heard it was gone."

Amanda nodded, her eyes moving over toward where their vehicles were still parked.

xxx

Olivia sat up slowly, her eyes taking in the empty blankets and sleeping bags around her. The tent was dimly lit, it was obvious that the sun had begun to set.

The brunette ran a hand through her unruly hair in a weak attempt to tame it, sighing when she lost her fingers in knots. She was sweating slightly despite the cold temperature beyond her makeshift bed, her dreams having reminded her of the fear she should have been feeling in her waking hours.

Her eyes fluttered shut, tightening as her brows dipped down. Remembering that Simon was most likely gone from this world, killed along with murderers and rapists. She tried to fight off the image of him sitting alone in a cell, without his family in his last moments.

The tears burned as they ran down her cheeks and a sob escaped her parted lips. She grabbed at her bangs and rocked back and forth in her blankets, pain bubbling up into her chest.

Suddenly another thought slipped into her mind, her hands moved quickly to the small pocket of her duffle bag. They shook as she pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper, trembling harder as the image met her eyes.

Olivia jumped as the sound of the zipper being pulled open suddenly broke the silence around her but she didn't move to turn. Her eyes instead stayed focused on the drawing in her hands.

"Oh, I didn't realize you were awake... I came to get you, they've got some dinner for everyone." Amanda said, voice straining slightly as she ducked into the small structure.

Her eyes widened as she realized what she'd interrupted, "I'm sorry... I'll go, I'll just bring you some food back-"

The blonde paused, shocked by the gentle grip of the hand that was now keeping her from exiting the way she had just come.

"No, stay please?" Olivia asked, her voice rough with emotion.

Amanda nodded, moving over next to the brunette and sitting indian style.

"Knowing what happened to Simon... It's painful. But what's worse is not knowing what happened to Calvin."

Amanda frowned, her hand reaching out tentatively to rub Olivia's back in small circles.

"I wasn't there to protect either of them... But Calvin, he... He had his whole life a head of him, with or without me. Just knowing he was okay... It would mean everything." She said, her voice breaking at the thought.

"Have you tried calling?"

"And texted... No response. Actually... I don't even have good service out here, I wouldn't know if he was trying to call me back either."

Amanda's frown deepened, although she'd never admit to it aloud she had attempted to call her mother and Kim and gotten the same results. It had gone straight to voicemail originally but now she couldn't even find a signal to try.

She felt the older woman's body shudder beneath her palm and instinctively wrapped her arms around the brunette. Instead of fighting the contact, Olivia turned into the embrace and hid her face in the crook of Amanda's neck. The blonde's eyes clamped shut as she tried to fend off her own tears, her chin resting gently on the top of Olivia's hair.

Her resolve finally broke when the older woman shifted closer, her body curling up as it pressed against the blonde's. It was finally sinking in for the two of them, their world was changing and it was not for the better. And ultimately, there was nothing they could do to stop it.


End file.
